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Students passing competency exams, by subject and gender 2010 - 2011

High school students present multiple competency exams on their student life, the subjects and the percentage by gender of the students passing such exams on a year gap can be seen on the (in the) survey. Subjects such as, computer science, mathematics, and foreign language(s)(spanish, German and french) are the ones that had more students passing their competency e xams, regarding the genders, girls were the ones that succeed (succeded) on these. On the other hand, boys and girls failed more on the other subjects, for example, physics, chemistry, history, and geography were the subjects that presented the lowest percentages, this meaning boys and girls were not so prepared or so good on these subjects. It can be seen that girls were more prepared than boys on mathematics, foreign languages, and computer science, and boys were more prepared on physics, chemistry, history, and geography. It can not be seen as a matter of gender, but a matter of the difficulty of the subject.
High school
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students
present multiple competency exams on their
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student
life, the
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subjects
and the percentage by gender of the
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students
passing such exams on a year gap can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on the (in the) survey.

Subjects such as, computer science, mathematics, and foreign language(s)(
Possible spelling mistake found.
spanish
, German and
“French” needs to be capitalized when you are referring to the language or country.
french
) are the
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ones
that had more
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students
passing their competency
Possible spelling mistake found.
e xams
, regarding the genders,
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girls
were the
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ones
that succeed (
Possible spelling mistake found.
succeded
) on these.

On the other hand
,
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boys
and
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girls
failed more on the other
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subjects
,
for example
, physics, chemistry, history, and geography were the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that presented the lowest percentages, this meaning
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boys
and
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girls
were not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
prepared or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
on these subjects.

It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
were more prepared than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
on mathematics, foreign languages, and computer science, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
were more prepared on physics, chemistry, history, and geography. It can not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as a matter of gender,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a matter of the difficulty of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
.
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IELTS essay Students passing competency exams, by subject and gender 2010 - 2011

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
163 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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