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Staying in boarding houses and away from house has many benefits, some at the same time discard ideas. Discuss both and also explain a reason of sending their children in boarding school.

Staying in boarding houses and away from house has many benefits, some at the same time discard ideas. 56DEp
In the past, boarding schools were considered place for educating children. Nowadays, traditional schools have good infrastructure which is meeting the demands of parents. According to some people boarding houses are best but some oppose it. To shed some light on this topic, I will discuss some advantages, disadvantages and reason for sending their children in boarding schools in the upcoming paragraphs. Boarding schools are best for personality development of an individual because they have a fix schedule for classes, sports activities and eating. Moreover, children learn to do each and everything by themselves which teach them a sense of responsibility and make them discipline. Children focus more on studies as they have fix time for playing and watching tv. Boarding schools do not take care of children as a parent would do. Children can feel lonely or homesickness, so they need their parents around to take proper care of them. In addition, children living away from parents can start disobeying them or can involve in illegal activities. Parents who send their children to the boarding may have different reasons like some parents do not have time for their child as both are employed. Some people want their children to face difficulties of the outer world in order to have succeed in life. To conclude, I would like to say that people should keep their children with themselves to nurture them well in life, as far as education is concerned traditional schools are now providing facilities that are as good as boarding schools does.
In the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
were considered
place for educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Nowadays, traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
infrastructure which is meeting the demands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boarding
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
are best
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
oppose it. To shed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
light on this topic, I will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages, disadvantages and reason for sending their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
in the upcoming paragraphs.

Boarding
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schools
are best for personality development of an individual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
schedule for classes, sports activities and eating.
Moreover
,
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children
learn to do each and everything by themselves which teach them a sense of responsibility and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them discipline.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
focus more on studies as they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
time for playing and watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
.

Boarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
do not take care of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
would do.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
can feel lonely or homesickness,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they need their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
around to take proper care of them.
In addition
,
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children
living away from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
disobeying them or can involve in illegal activities.

Parents who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boarding
may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
reasons like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
do not have time for their child as both
are employed
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to face difficulties of the outer world in order to have
Use past participle here: "succeeded".
succeed
in life.

To conclude
, I would like to say that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
with themselves to nurture them well in life, as far as education
is concerned
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
providing facilities that are as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
does.
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IELTS essay Staying in boarding houses and away from house has many benefits, some at the same time discard ideas.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
254 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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