Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Sports lessons should not be interfered schools' lessons programme because these physical activities are not necessary as other lessons, and they should be done guided by children's families.

Sports lessons should not be interfered schools' lessons programme because these physical activities are not necessary as other lessons, and they should be done guided by children's families. E9wax
Sports lessons should not be interfered schools' lessons programme because these physical activities are not necessary as other lessons, and they should be done guided by children's families. However, this decision presumably will affect pupils' concentration for the class and therefore regular physical exercise should be added into a part of the curriculum. Children can rest and refresh their brains when they do sports activities after their tiring lessons at the schools. Also, they can be relaxed and can feel comfortable while they make soothing exercises. Thus, the pupils can easily emphasize their classrooms' studies such as Math and Literature so they would be successful at their schools' careers. Otherwise, parents' responsibility could increase over their children when they merely are interested in material issues at the schools and therefore both of families and children can be far away from the peaceful home environment. When teachers have abundant knowledge about possible injuries, parents do not need to be worried during their children join whatever sports activities in the schools. On the other hand, students could not listen to their tutors when they start to harmful exercises and thus pupils could damage themselves because of heavy sports' materials. On this kind of condition, school managers try to escape from taking responsibility, and family of the child who is into trouble have criticized the school's policy towards physical exercise. Thus, making sports activities turn into a nightmare for both of sides who are the schools' teachers and the family of the students. To sum up, when redundant restrictions are made by the authorities, sports activities should be involved schools' curriculums because of improving of childrens' physical and mental healthies. In my honest opinion, the students can feel more confident while they join regular sports exercise at the schools.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lessons
should not
be interfered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lessons
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
are not necessary as other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lessons
, and they should
be done
guided by children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
.
However
, this decision presumably will affect pupils' concentration for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
and
therefore
regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
into a part of the curriculum.

Children can rest and refresh their brains when they do
After the auxiliary verb 'do', use the base form of a verb. Did you mean "sport"?
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
after their tiring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lessons
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
Also
, they can
be relaxed
and can feel comfortable while they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
soothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
.
Thus
, the pupils can
easily
emphasize their classrooms' studies such as Math and Literature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they would be successful at their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools'
careers.
Otherwise
, parents' responsibility could increase over their children when they
merely
are interested
in material issues at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
and
therefore
both of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
and children can be far away from the peaceful home environment. When teachers have abundant knowledge about possible injuries, parents do not need to
be worried
during their children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
whatever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
in the schools.

On the other hand
, students could not listen to their tutors when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to harmful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
and
thus
pupils could damage themselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of heavy sports' materials. On this kind of condition,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
managers try to escape from taking responsibility, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
of the child who is into trouble have criticized the school's policy towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
.
Thus
, making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
turn into a nightmare for both of sides who are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools'
teachers and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
of the students.

To sum up, when redundant restrictions
are made
by the authorities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
should
be involved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools'
curriculums
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of improving of
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
and mental
Possible spelling mistake found.
healthies
. In my honest opinion, the students can feel more confident while they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Sports lessons should not be interfered schools' lessons programme because these physical activities are not necessary as other lessons, and they should be done guided by children's families.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Sports lessons should not be interfered schools' lessons programme because these physical activities are not necessary as other lessons, and they should be done guided by children's families.