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Soon retirement of workers can create job opportunities for young people. discuss

Soon retirement of workers can create job opportunities for young people. discuss bYoLX
Recently, the phenomenon of job opportunities for the youngster and its corresponding impact has sparked a heated debate. Although contested by many that the matter of job variety is highly beneficial, such an issue is regarded thoroughly as both constructive and positive by a substantial number of individuals. I am inclined to believe that part-time jobs can be a plus, and I will analyze that throughout this essay. From a social standpoint, young employees can provide the society with some noticeable effects which are rooted in the fact that the merits of full-time labors, as well as freelancers, are inextricably bound up. According to my own experience, when I was a university student, I performed an academic experiment which discovered the importance of job offers for talented people. Thus, beneficial ramifications of both the ageing population and old officers apparently can be seen. Within the realm of science, early retirement might increase the consequences of low income. Moreover, the fundamental elements of high taxation rate might relate to this reality that the demerits of an underpaid worker pertain to expensive housing. As an example, some scientific research undertaken by a prestigious university has asserted that the downside of soon retirement is correlated negatively with life expectancy. Hence, it is correct to presume the preconceived notion of creating jobs and opportunities for young people. To conclude, while there are several compelling arguments on both sides, I profoundly believe that the benefits of providing job vacancies far outweigh its drawbacks. Not only do the advantages of well-paid jobs prove the significance of easy employment process, but also pinpoint long-term implications.
Recently, the phenomenon of
job
opportunities for the youngster and its corresponding impact has sparked a heated debate. Although contested by
many
that the matter of
job
variety is
highly
beneficial, such an issue
is regarded
thoroughly
as both constructive and
positive
by a substantial number of individuals. I
am inclined
to believe that part-time
jobs
can be a plus, and I will analyze that throughout this essay.

From a social standpoint, young employees can provide the society with
some
noticeable effects which
are rooted
in the fact that the merits of full-time labors,
as well
as freelancers, are
inextricably
bound up. According to my
own
experience, when I was a university student, I performed an academic experiment which discovered the importance of
job
offers for talented
people
.
Thus
, beneficial ramifications of both the
ageing
population and
old
officers
apparently
can be
seen
.

Within the realm of science, early retirement might increase the consequences of low income.
Moreover
, the fundamental elements of high taxation rate might relate to this reality that the demerits of an underpaid worker pertain to expensive housing. As an example,
some
scientific research undertaken by a prestigious university has asserted that the downside of
soon
retirement
is correlated
negatively
with life expectancy.
Hence
, it is correct to presume the preconceived notion of creating
jobs
and opportunities for young
people
.

To conclude
, while there are several compelling arguments on both sides, I
profoundly
believe that the benefits of providing
job
vacancies far outweigh its drawbacks. Not
only
do the advantages of well-paid
jobs
prove the significance of easy employment process,
but
also
pinpoint long-term implications.
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IELTS essay Soon retirement of workers can create job opportunities for young people. discuss

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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