Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their spare time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their spare time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. x9yb
Utilizing free time in a fruitful manner is really crucial particularly for children. It is believed by some people that parents should indulge their kids in organized group activities in the free time. However, some think that a child should be trained to remain busy in his own interests. I strongly agree with the former statement as it brings more benefits later in their lives. On one hand, engaging children in organized group activities in leisure time is likely to produce more confident, skillful and environmentally adjustable adults. It’s because when a child socializes with other children of varied interests and thoughts; they exchange ideas with one another, tend to adopt new things out of their comfort zone and enhance communication skills that assist in dealing with people of different mindsets. Therefore, teaming children into groups and allowing them to enjoy their free hours would not only help them professionally, but also help in their personal lives as it changes the overall personality of the human being. On the other hand, advocates of the belief that a child should be trained in a way that they can remain engaged in their spare time, are also correct up to some extent. It is due to the fact that no one is going to live with us forever, hence a child should know how to spend the time when no one is around. For instance, nowadays, many parents wish to send their children abroad for higher studies, but if a child would not be well trained to act independently, it will become difficult for him to adjust alone. In conclusion, even though both concepts have their advantages, I personally believe that involving young ones in organized group activities in their spare time provides more benefits in the adult phase of life.
Utilizing free
time
in a fruitful manner
is
really
crucial
particularly
for
children
. It
is believed
by
some
people
that parents should indulge their kids in organized
group
activities in the free
time
.
However
,
some
think
that a
child
should
be trained
to remain busy in his
own
interests. I
strongly
agree
with the former statement as it brings more benefits later in their
lives
.

On one hand, engaging
children
in organized
group
activities in leisure
time
is likely to produce more confident, skillful and
environmentally
adjustable adults. It’s
because
when a
child
socializes with other
children
of varied interests and thoughts; they exchange
ideas
with one another, tend to adopt new things out of their comfort zone and enhance communication
skills
that assist in dealing with
people
of
different
mindsets.
Therefore
, teaming
children
into
groups
and allowing them to enjoy their free hours would not
only
help
them
professionally
,
but
also
help
in their personal
lives
as it
changes
the
overall
personality of the human being.

On the other hand
, advocates of the belief that a
child
should
be trained
in a way that they can remain engaged in their spare
time
, are
also
correct up to
some
extent. It is due to the fact that no one is going to
live
with us forever,
hence
a
child
should know how to spend the
time
when no one is around.
For instance
, nowadays,
many
parents wish to
send
their
children
abroad for higher studies,
but
if a
child
would not be
well trained
to act
independently
, it will become difficult for him to adjust alone.

In conclusion
,
even though
both concepts have their advantages, I
personally
believe that involving young ones in organized
group
activities in their spare
time
provides more benefits in the adult phase of life.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their spare time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts