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Some people use the internet to search for solution to their medical problems. Is it a positive or negative development? Give your own opinion and example from your experience.

Now days internet searching is very common in each generation people because cheap data packs and all public are finding their different solution through internet search. Nevertheless, some people also searching for their medical need sometime it is helpful but also sometime it cause serious problem. I personally think that medical treatment by internet search is sometime harmful for us. I disagree with the statement.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
An apostrophe may be missing.
days
internet searching is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common in each generation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
data packs and all public are finding their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
solution through internet search.
Nevertheless
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
also
searching for their medical need sometime it is helpful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
sometime it
After ‘it’, use the third-person verb form “causes”.
cause
serious problem. I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that medical treatment by internet search is sometime harmful for us. I disagree with the statement.
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IELTS essay Some people use the internet to search for solution to their medical problems. Is it a positive or negative development? Give your own opinion and example from your experience.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
65 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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