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Some people think that having a university degree is the key to a great job, while others think that gaining experience and improving soft skills is the best way to get a good job.

Some people think that having a university degree is the key to a great job, while others think that gaining experience and improving soft skills is the best way to get a good job. pagom
Some people think that having a university degree is the key to a great job, while others think that gaining experience and improving soft skills is the best way to get a good job. In my opinion, even though having a university degree plays an important role in finding a good job, having experience and great soft skills are more important. On the one hand, people may think that a university degree on a CV looks really great and furthermore increases the chance of getting hired. In other words, an undergraduate degree is the key to being employed. Getting into a high class university and completing a bachelor’s degree show one’s effort and dedication in a specific field. Therefore, it is a great proof of one’s capabilities and HR people may give privilege to those who have a university degree when they are looking for a perfect match for the open positions. On the other hand, having experience and great soft skills are becoming more important than ever for people who are hiring. In other words, experience and great soft skills show one’s capability to cope and handle possible problems and issues that one may come across. Soft skills, namely leadership and feeling empathy, are considered to be key to success in workplaces. Thus, these skills are very desirable for a potential candidate and may increase the chances of getting hired. In addition to soft skills, experience is also a very important indicator of one’s way of doing business and sector knowledge. In other words, people with great soft skills and strong experience may be more desirable than a candidate with a university degree. In conclusion, getting a good job may require different skills or background depending on the sector and field. Some jobs in the business market may give priority to academic background, while others give priority to experience and soft skills. Therefore, people looking for a job opportunity should define the requirements of their desired job before applying for it.
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Some
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people
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think
that
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having
a
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university
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degree
is the key to a
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great
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job
, while others
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think
that gaining
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experience
and improving
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soft
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skills
is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
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job
. In my opinion,
even though
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having
a
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university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in finding a
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good
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job
,
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having
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experience
and
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great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
soft
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skills
are more
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important
.

On the one hand,
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people
may
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think
that a
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university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
on a CV looks
really
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great
and
furthermore
increases the chance of getting hired. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, an undergraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
is the key to
being employed
. Getting into a high
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and completing a bachelor’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
one’s effort and dedication in a specific field.
Therefore
, it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
proof of one’s capabilities and HR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may give privilege to those who have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
when they are looking for a perfect match for the open positions.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are becoming more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than ever for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are hiring. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
one’s capability to cope and handle possible problems and issues that one may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
across.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
,
namely
leadership and feeling empathy,
are considered
to be key to success in workplaces.
Thus
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
desirable for a potential candidate and may increase the chances of getting hired.
In addition
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
is
also
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
indicator of one’s way of doing business and sector knowledge. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
may be more desirable than a candidate with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
degree.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
conclusion, getting a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
may require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
or background depending on the sector and field.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in the business market may give priority to academic background, while others give priority to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
looking for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunity should define the requirements of their desired
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
applying for it.
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IELTS essay Some people think that having a university degree is the key to a great job, while others think that gaining experience and improving soft skills is the best way to get a good job.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
332 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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