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Some people think that hard work helps to achieve financial success while others think that it is not the only thing which contributes to financial success Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that hard work helps to achieve financial success while others think that it is not the only thing which contributes to financial success wJdn
Financial success is one of the key parameters to judge how accomplished a person is in his career. While some people believe that working hard is the only way to succeed financially, others have a view that hard work coupled with other factors help a person achieve monetary success. In this essay, I will discuss both views, though I personally feel that a person needs more than just hard work to accomplish financial growth. Hard work helps a person to become proficient in his area of work as the person becomes specialized in his job. This enables the person to perform better at his duties and slowly climb the ladder of success. Indira Nooyi, for example, started her career in the PepsiCo brand as an entry-level executive. Gradually, with her hard work, perseverance, and intelligence, she finally headed the same company as the Chief Executive officer. In this way, she was able to secure one of the best compensation packages in the industry. If one, despite being intelligent, is not ready to work hard, there are slim chances of success. Thus, people believe that hard work is the key ingredient to financial success. Some people, including me, on the other hand, believe that hard work is not the only factor to achieve financial success. There are other factors, such as spending habits and luck, which decide the financial fate of a person. If a person is a spendthrift, despite earning a handsome amount of money, there are few chances of his being financially successful. Luck also plays a crucial role, as many times it has been seen that it can make a person rich or poor overnight. In conclusion, considering the importance of hard work in life, it is understandable that some view it as the deciding factor in achieving financial success. Nevertheless, in my view, the role of other factors such as spending habits and luck cannot be ignored.
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Financial
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success
is one of the key parameters to judge how accomplished a
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person
is in his career. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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people
believe that working
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hard
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to succeed
financially
, others have a
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view
that
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hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
coupled with
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other
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factors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
achieve monetary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. In this essay, I will discuss both
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views
, though I
personally
feel that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
needs more than
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just
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hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to accomplish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
growth.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to become proficient in his area of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
becomes specialized in his job. This enables the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to perform better at his duties and
slowly
climb the ladder of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. Indira
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nooyi
,
for example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
her career in the PepsiCo brand as an entry-level executive.
Gradually
, with her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, perseverance, and intelligence, she
finally
headed the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
as the Chief Executive officer. In this way, she was able to secure one of the best compensation packages in the industry. If one, despite being intelligent, is not ready to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
, there are slim chances of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
Thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is the key ingredient to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
success.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, including me, on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
to achieve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. There are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
, such as spending habits and luck, which decide the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
fate of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is a spendthrift, despite earning a handsome amount of money, there are few chances of his being
financially
successful. Luck
also
plays a crucial role, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
times it has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
rich or poor overnight.

In conclusion
, considering the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in life, it is understandable that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
it as the deciding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
in achieving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
Nevertheless
, in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
, the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
such as spending habits and luck cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that hard work helps to achieve financial success while others think that it is not the only thing which contributes to financial success

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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