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Some People Think That For Individuals, Planning For The Future Is A Waste Of Time. It Is More Important For Individuals To Focus On The Present. Do You Agree Or Disagree? v.2

Some People Think That For Individuals, Planning For The Future Is A Waste Of Time. It Is More Important For Individuals To Focus On The Present. v. 2
In today modernized world, people are becoming more progressive and finding the new ways for entertainment, collecting assets and making their life easier. Methods of getting happiness is different from one person to another. So people have to provide lots of thinking and efforts to fulfill their aspects. I am fully agreed with the above argument and I will discuss my opinion in forthcoming paragraphs. Some people are thinking about their carrier opportunity since their childhood and some are as parents plan their children' s secure future life in their minds. For instance, people want to become doctors and engineers for their great future and they are applying this formula on their children' s life too. However, on the other hand, there are some people who always live as per their current situations and requirements and act regarding their current needs and possibilities. They plan only those things who will help them in near future. For instance, people join professions on accounts of recent requirements and be able to supply needs for their professions. In my opinion, Every people should have to set their minds plans to current time. Sometimes, They may not be able to get the things as they decided. In conclusion, we should have to spend our precious time only on those things which are realistic and prepare our plan for current future.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
modernized world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are becoming more progressive and finding the new ways for entertainment, collecting assets and making their life easier. Methods of getting happiness is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from one person to another.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
provide lots of thinking and efforts to fulfill their aspects. I am
fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
with the above argument and I will discuss my opinion in forthcoming paragraphs.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are thinking about their carrier opportunity since their childhood and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are as parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
their
Possible spelling mistake found.
children&
#039; s secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
life in their minds.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to become doctors and engineers for their great
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
future and
they are applying this formula on their
Possible spelling mistake found.
children&
#039; s life too.
However
,
on the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
as per their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
situations and requirements and act regarding their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
needs and possibilities. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
those things who will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in near
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
professions on accounts of recent requirements and be able to supply needs for their professions.

In my opinion, Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
set their minds
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plans
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
time.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, They may not be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the things as they decided.

In conclusion
, we should
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend our precious time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on those things which are realistic and prepare our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Some People Think That For Individuals, Planning For The Future Is A Waste Of Time. It Is More Important For Individuals To Focus On The Present. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
226 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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