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Some people think that all students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is widely acknowledged by some people that students of higher education, especially universities should study every areas they prefer. While other part of people believe that they should only learn subjects which will be profitable for their future career, like technological or scientific subjects. Both views that mentioned above will be discussed in this essay. On the one hand, it is natural that desire of the students is learning all their favorite subjects. Since, studying some subjects by pressing of anyone is not so effective and efficient of this condition will be so negative. To exemplify my own sister studies at famous university in our country's as well as she exchanges with her experience with me and says about subjects of she's university. Additionally all of her perfect marks are from the subjects which are interesting for her. Therefore, most of students want to learn subjects according to their preference. On the other hand, there are also much more senseless and not useful subjects in the system of high education. As well as students who worry about their future life, naturally want to learn subjects which are beneficial for their future jobs. For instance, subjects like history, philosophy or p. e are not significant for students who study at the faculty of IT. Hence it depends on interest and ambitions of every student. In conclusion factors which are highlighted above are main reasons why I am inclined to believe that second view is more significant for all students from my standpoint.
It is
widely
acknowledged by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of higher education,
especially
universities should study every
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “area”?
areas
they prefer. While other part of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which will be profitable for their future career, like technological or scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. Both views that mentioned above will
be discussed
in this essay.

On the one hand, it is natural that desire of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
is learning all their favorite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. Since, studying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
by pressing of anyone is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
effective and efficient of this condition will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
. To exemplify my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
sister studies at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
university in our country's
as well
as she exchanges with her experience with me and says about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
of she's university.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Additionally
all of her perfect marks are from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which are interesting for her.
Therefore
, most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
want to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
according to their preference.

On the other hand
, there are
also
much more senseless and not useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in the system of high education.
As well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who worry about their future life,
naturally
want to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which are beneficial for their future jobs.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
like history, philosophy or p. e are not significant for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who study at the faculty of IT.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
it depends on interest and ambitions of every student.

In conclusion
factors which
are highlighted
above are main reasons why I
am inclined
to believe that second view is more significant for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from my standpoint.
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IELTS essay Some people think that all students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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