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Prison is common way in most countries to solve problems of crime however the more efficiency solution is to provide people a better education. agree or disagree

Thesedays, many Nation Locke of criminals to end disputes of illegal actions whereas to solve this issue education system should serve required knowledge to every individuals. I agree with the statement that providing education can change the behaviour of per son rate of criminal activity will decrease. To embak with, one of the main reason for this is lack of skills because majority of this kinds of people are uneducated and unskilled so they struggle for a finding the right employment as a result they opt for illegal way of earning for their daily needs and punished imprisonment. Another reason is that they are not monitored after the period of reason is finished so these people again make some mistake and lead to continuous cycle of this. However, providing education helps a lot.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Thesedays
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Nation Locke of criminals to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
disputes of illegal actions whereas to solve this issue education system should serve required knowledge to every
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “individual”?
individuals
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement that providing education can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the
Possible spelling mistake. ‘behaviour’ is British English.
behaviour
of per son rate of criminal activity will decrease. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
embak
with, one of the main reason for this is lack of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
‘This’ does not seem to match the plural noun ‘kinds’. Did you mean “these”?
this
kinds of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are uneducated
and unskilled
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they struggle for a finding the right employment
as a result
they opt for illegal way of earning for their daily needs and punished imprisonment. Another reason is that they are not monitored after the period of reason is
Use a comma before ‘so’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
finished
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
again
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
mistake and lead to continuous cycle of this.
However
, providing education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
a lot.

IELTS essay Prison is common way in most countries to solve problems of crime however the more efficiency solution is to provide people a better education. agree or disagree

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
133 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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