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SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT IT IS POSSIBLE TO TELL A LOT ABOUT A PERSON’S CULTURE AND CHARACTER FROM THEIR CHOICE OF CLOTHES. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE? v.20

SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT IT IS POSSIBLE TO TELL A LOT ABOUT A PERSON’S CULTURE AND CHARACTER FROM THEIR CHOICE OF CLOTHES. v. 20
Most people are of the opinion that a person's culture and character can be determined from their choices of clothing. As far as I am concerned, I strongly disagree with this view. There are two major reasons why it is impossible to tell the tribe and behaviour of an individual by how they are dressed. I will discuss these two reasons below. Nowadays, ways of dressing are forced on people by the organisation they belong to. Due to this, people do not dress the way they are used to or the way they would have loved to; hence, concluding the culture and behaviour of a person may be impossible because of this. To illustrate, I will share my experience. Before I joined my present firm, I grew up in a culture where people could wear local attires to workplaces. However, when I resumed at my new office, I was given an orientation on the clothing policy of the firm and how members of staff were expected to behave. In addition, I was informed that a breech of these laws was punishable. As a result, I had to adopt the new dress pattern which did not depict my culture or attitude at all. Another reason why it will be difficult to judge an individual's culture and attitude by how they are kitted is the effect of globalisation, diversity and inclusion. These days, people are exposed to different ways of dressing due to globalization. There are high chances of people adopting styles they come across daily; hence, it is very difficult to determine their way of life by just a glance. To make it more interesting, most foreigners wear the clothes better than the locals. For example, my cousin and I visited Ghana a week ago and we bought some of their local attires. Since we returned, my cousin basically wears the attire everywhere! A person would be wrong to think she is Ghanian because she is clothed in Ghanian outfits. To conclude, I will like to reemphasize that to determine a person's behaviour or culture, you will need to look beyond their dress sense. This is because of the effect of globalisation, diversity and inclusion.
Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are of the opinion that a person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and character can
be determined
from their choices of clothing. As far as I
am concerned
, I
strongly
disagree with this view. There are two major reasons why it is impossible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the tribe and
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of an individual by how they
are dressed
. I will discuss these two reasons below.

Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
of dressing
are forced
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
they belong to. Due to this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not dress the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
they would have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
to;
hence
, concluding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of a person may be impossible
because of this
. To illustrate, I will share my experience.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
my present firm, I grew up in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could wear local attires to workplaces.
However
, when I resumed at my new office, I was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
an orientation on the clothing policy of the firm and how members of staff were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to behave.
In addition
, I
was informed
that a breech of these laws was punishable.
As a result
, I had to adopt the new dress pattern which did not depict my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
or attitude at all.

Another reason why it will be difficult to judge an individual's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and attitude by how they
are kitted
is the effect of
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
, diversity and inclusion. These days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are exposed
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
of dressing due to
Do not mix variants of the same word ('globalization' and 'globalisation') within a single text.
globalization
. There are high chances of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
adopting styles they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
across daily;
hence
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to determine their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
of life by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a glance. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it more interesting, most foreigners wear the clothes better than the locals.
For example
, my cousin and I visited Ghana a week
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
ago and
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of their local attires. Since we returned, my cousin
basically
wears the attire everywhere! A person would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
she is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ghanian
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
she
is clothed
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ghanian
outfits.

To conclude
, I
Did you mean "would"?
will
like to reemphasize that to determine a person's
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, you will need to look beyond their dress sense. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the effect of
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
, diversity and inclusion.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT IT IS POSSIBLE TO TELL A LOT ABOUT A PERSON’S CULTURE AND CHARACTER FROM THEIR CHOICE OF CLOTHES. v. 20

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
364 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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