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Some People Say That Advertising Is Extremely Successful At Persuading Us To Buy Things | Band 8 IELTS Essay Sample

As our world is increasingly more modern, the way people advert their product is becoming more creative than ever. Our society still considered it as an essential part of their lives, since it brings considerable amount of profit. On the contrary, another thought has been raised, saying that it is no longer neccesary, because it is an old-fashioned method and nobody would ever take a look at it. Firstly, in a vast-changing world, modern people tend to find out reliable informations, that can convince them to make purchase of a product. And in this case, advert is really efficient due to the fact that it can be publicized through various types such as magazines ad, TV commercials, newspapers ad. For instance, magazines ad has often eye-catching designs, so that it attracts number of people to spend their money on its products. Moreover, TV commercial has become an indispensable part of everyone's lives and they often commercialize their product during peak viewing time, so it would have large target of market. Consequently, advert is more practical and people have many options to find out from which type of advert do they want to get the details of products. Secondly, if advertising couldn't draw people's attention, it is simply because it has failed to make their product as interesting as possible for the the customers and not because it is too prevalent. For example, plenty of advertising can be vividly seen on social media and people is still interested in knowing the details of the things that they see from advertising. Consequently, people woudln't ignore a commercial if it could answer their curiousity or catch their focus on. To conclude, advertising has definitely more benefits rather than some drawbacks, so it is reasonable to see advertising has become so acceptable for many people.

As our world is increasingly
 more modern, the way You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 advert their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcommodityprofitbrandworkamountcrop
product
 is becoming more creative than ever. Our society still
 considered it as an essential part of their This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :resides
lives
, since it brings considerable amount of profit. On the contrary
, another This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reckonedassumedbelievedconsidered
thought
 has been raised
, saying that it is no longer Possible spelling mistake found.necessary
neccesary
, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 it is an This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ancientagedmature
old
-fashioned method and nobody would ever take a look at it.

Firstly
, in a vast-changing world, modern You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 tend to find out reliable The word 'informations' is a legal term. In standard English, the word 'information' is a non-count noun. Did you mean "information"?information
informations
, that can convince them to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
purchase
 of a You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcommodityprofitbrandworkamountcrop
product
. And in this case
, advert is really
 efficient due to the fact that it can be publicized
 through various types such as magazines ad, TV commercials, newspapers ad. For instance
, magazines ad has This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:frequently
often
 eye-catching designs, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
so
 that it attracts number of You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 to spend their money on its You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcommodityprofitbrandworkamountcrop
products
. Moreover
, TV commercial has become an indispensable part of everyone's Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).lives, and
lives and
 they This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:frequently
often
 commercialize their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcommodityprofitbrandworkamountcrop
product
 during peak viewing time, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
so
 it would have large target of market. Consequently
, advert is more practical and You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
 have This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
many
 options to find out from which type of advert do they want to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
get
 the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :particulars
details
 of products.

Secondly
, if advertising couldn't draw This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
's attention, it is simply
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 it has failed to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
 their You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcommodityprofitbrandworkamountcrop
product
 as interesting as possible for Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.the
the the
 customers and not This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 it is too prevalent. For example
, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:abundance
plenty
 of advertising can be vividly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :witnessed
seen
 on social media and You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.amarearen
is
still
 interested in knowing the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :particulars
details
 of the things that they This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :witness
see
 from advertising. Consequently
, You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
Possible spelling mistake found.wouldn
woudln
't This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :neglect
ignore
 a commercial if it could answer their Possible spelling mistake found.curiosity
curiousity
 or catch their focus on.

To conclude
, advertising has definitely more benefits rather
 than This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 drawbacks, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
so
 it is reasonable to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :witness
see
 advertising has become This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
so
 acceptable for This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcrowdfamilycommunitynationsocietypublic
people
. 