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Some people claim that teenage criminals should be treated as adults, while others believe that they should be treated less sewverely, as juveniles. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people claim that teenage criminals should be treated as adults, while others believe that they should be treated less sewverely, as juveniles. e2qO
It is frequently said that younster outlaws should be regarded as adults. In contrast, it is believed that the former should be faced less severely, as juniors. Personally, I am in favour of the second view. To begin with, some people claim that adolescent criminals should be treated as grown men and women prisoners. That is true owning to the fact that every crime s a crime, not only in cases of a murder or a major heist, and the law is for all citizens, regardless of their current age. Consequently, teenagers should be treated as adult criminals. Namely, on occasions of a severe crime such as homocide, either a lifetime prison or the dealth penalty may be considered the most prefferable choices for convicted prisoners. Moreover, everyone need to live with the consequences of his actions, even the younger outlaws. Furthemore, there is also the fear that supposing that they are released, it is more likely that many teen ex-prisones will probably repeat the crime. As a result, many of us believe that young outlaws should be treated as over eighteen years old convicted criminals. On the other hand, supporters of the second opinion think that adolescent prisoners should be handled with a mediocre behaviour as juveniles. That is valid on account of that most of them may probably be regarded as lost souls, needing guidance and support. In fact, many of them received misguided information from their background and the majority of them are coming mainly from poor environments, with history of criminal record from quite a few members of their family. In addition, most criminals having convicted in a young age for severe crimes indeed live with the weight of their actions and many of them may have possilby regretted for what they did in the past, refraining from aggressive attidutes in the future. However, they have an entire life left to live. Therefore, why does not the society try to incorporate them in its core? In conclusion, taking everything into account, I am inclined to believe that a second chance should be given to many criminals, no matter how many crimes did they comitt in the past and regardless of the age that they did them. To be precise, it is up to their choice so as to transform the current situation in something better than they are now.
It is
frequently
said that
Possible spelling mistake found.
younster
outlaws should
be regarded
as adults.
In contrast
, it
is believed
that the former should
be faced
less
severely
, as juniors.
Personally
, I am in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of the second view. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
claim that adolescent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
should
be treated
as grown
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women prisoners.
That is
true owning to the fact that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
s a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in cases of a murder or a major heist, and the law is for all citizens, regardless of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
age.
Consequently
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
should
be treated
as adult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
.
Namely
, on occasions of a severe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
homocide
, either a lifetime prison or the
Possible spelling mistake found.
dealth
penalty may
be considered
the most
Possible spelling mistake found.
prefferable
choices for convicted prisoners.
Moreover
, everyone need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with the consequences of his actions, even the younger outlaws.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furthemore
, there is
also
the fear that supposing that they
are released
, it is more likely that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
teen
Possible spelling mistake found.
ex-prisones
will
probably
repeat the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
As a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of us believe that young outlaws should
be treated
as over eighteen years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
convicted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
.
On the other hand
, supporters of the second opinion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that adolescent prisoners should
be handled
with a mediocre
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
as juveniles.
That is
valid on account of that most of them may
probably
be regarded
as lost souls, needing guidance and support. In fact,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them received misguided information from their background and the majority of them are coming
mainly
from poor environments, with history of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
record from quite a few members of their family.
In addition
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
having convicted in a young age for severe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
indeed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with the weight of their actions and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them may have
Possible spelling mistake found.
possilby
regretted for what they did in the past, refraining from aggressive
Possible spelling mistake found.
attidutes
in the future.
However
, they have an entire life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
Therefore
, why does not the society try to incorporate them in its core?
In conclusion
, taking everything into account, I
am inclined
to believe that a second chance should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
, no matter how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
did they
Possible spelling mistake found.
comitt
in the past and regardless of the age that they did them. To be precise, it is up to their choice
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
transform the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation in something better than they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
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IELTS essay Some people claim that teenage criminals should be treated as adults, while others believe that they should be treated less sewverely, as juveniles.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
393 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Some people claim that teenage criminals should be treated as adults, while others believe that they should be treated less sewverely, as juveniles. Discuss both views and give your opinion.