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Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. do ypu agree or disagree?

Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. do ypu agree or disagree? lBeW
A Tax is play a significant role in the growth of any country. Some people believes that they should not to pay tax from their income and save money from themselves. I am totally disagree with this opinion. There are many benefits to government as well as an individuals towards paying tax. Firstly, As Tax incomes help to country’s economy, its affects to an individuals life styles as well. With this income, government can full fill their basic needs in minimum rates. So people can easily survive with low budget income. Secondly, Persons will get more facilities such as transportation, electricity, hydro, water supply, etc. While some individuals think to save money by avoiding pay tax, they have their own benefits behind it.
A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tax
is play a significant role in the growth of any country.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
believes
that they should not to pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
and save money from themselves. I am
totally
Consider using a past participle here: "disagreed".
disagree
with this opinion.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
as well
as
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "an individual" or simply "individuals"?
an individuals
towards paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
.
Firstly
, As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tax
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incomes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to country’s economy, its affects to an
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "individuals'" or "individual's"?
individuals
life styles
as well
. With this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can full fill their basic needs in minimum rates.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
easily
survive with low budget
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
.
Secondly
, Persons will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more facilities such as transportation, electricity, hydro, water supply, etc.

While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to save money by avoiding pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
, they have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits behind it.
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IELTS essay Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. do ypu agree or disagree?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
123 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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