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some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). to what extend do you agree or disagree

some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). Vd77
Some individuals think that community services such as volunteering, working for a charity and other jobs that do not need to pay should become a required part of high school programs. All people know, how community works can be good for developing our environment, we can contribute to the development of the world. However, at some points I disagree with this given statement. And this essay will contain some reasons and consist examples why I can not be agree with given announcement. Nowadays, there a lot of volunteering centers in the world, which want to help for our planet and population get better. However, everyone has their own wishes, and no one can force them to become a volunteer. On other hands volunteering means help for other of their own accords, not because they should do it only by the reason, it is compulsory at school. As I said, we have immeasurable centers which, wants to help for other. But if it will be significant part of our school, students will not be obliged to do so of their own free will. It may wrongly affect the further prosperity of the world, as teenagers do not want to do this. Secondly, high school students have a lot of subjects and limited period of their time. In addition to study, students also need rest. For instance, some schools, like lyceums or specialized schools, study until the evening from morning. Since they study in specialized schools, they have a lot of homework and homework. In addition, all high school students must prepare for the exams they must take to enter universities. In conclusion, government should not make community survices as mandatory for students of high school.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that community services such as volunteering, working for a charity and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
jobs that do not need to pay should become a required part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
programs. All
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
know, how community works can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for developing our environment, we can contribute to the development of the world.
However
, at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
points I disagree with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement. And this essay will contain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons and consist examples why I can not be
Consider using a past participle here: "agreed".
agree
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
announcement.

Nowadays, there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
volunteering centers in the world, which want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for our planet and population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better.
However
, everyone has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
wishes, and no one can force them to become a volunteer. On
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hands volunteering means
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
accords, not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they should do it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by the reason, it is compulsory at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. As I said, we have immeasurable centers which, wants to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
if it will be significant part of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will not
be obliged
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
free will. It may
wrongly
affect the
further
prosperity of the world, as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
do not want to do this.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
subjects and limited period of their time.
In addition
to study,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
also
need rest.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, like lyceums or specialized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, study until the evening from morning. Since they study in specialized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
homework and homework.
In addition
, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
prepare for the exams they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take to enter universities.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
community
Possible spelling mistake found.
survices
as mandatory for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
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IELTS essay some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children).

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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