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Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment

Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment 7E1n
there is serious debate between people who think the punishment of every crime must be the same for all criminals, and people who believe it is necessary to seek for the reasons which make a crime happen and then decide for punishment. the first group argue that as there is no difference in harmful effects of breaking the law for the society, all citizens must be the same for legislation system. the believe that people from all walks of life should respect the law like each other in order to have a lawful society and it's non of the society's business that what made someone to be harmful for the community and do for example burglary or kill someone, the only thing that is crucial is that a criminal must know the exact penalty for his crime before attending to do that crime and after that he is ready to accept what governors have approved for that illegal act. they also say if the offenders realize that reducing the chastisement of their guilt is possible, it might diminish their fear of doing an unlawful act. on the other hand, other part of the society think that not all criminals are innate criminals, some just do illegal acts because they were forced to do them, sometimes maybe to rescue there families' life. these people believe that if legislators help this part of criminals to iron out their difficulties and set some punishments for them based on their guilt, it can have advantages for the society. for instance, some judges condemn some criminals to work in nursing homes for some years. on the contrary, some offenders are so dangerous and of course legislators must have rigorous punishments for them to keep others safe. I'm definitely with the second part and i think some criminals would back to way if we help them and punish them in a sufficient way and obviously this approach can be beneficial for both criminals and the society.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
is serious debate between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the punishment of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be the same for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who believe it is necessary to seek for the reasons which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
happen and then decide for punishment.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
first
group argue that as there is no difference in harmful effects of breaking the law for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, all citizens
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be the same for legislation system.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
Did you mean "belief" (noun) instead of believe (verb)?
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from all walks of life should respect the law like each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
in order to have a lawful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
and it's non of the society's business that what made someone to be harmful for the community and do
for example
burglary or kill someone, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing
that is
crucial is that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know the exact penalty for his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
attending to do that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and after that he is ready to accept what governors have approved for that illegal act.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
they
also
say if the offenders realize that reducing the chastisement of their guilt is possible, it might diminish their fear of doing an unlawful act.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
are innate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
do illegal acts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
were forced
to do them,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
maybe to rescue there families' life.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that if legislators
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
this part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
to iron out their difficulties and set
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
punishments for them based on their guilt, it can have advantages for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
instance,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
judges condemn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
to work in nursing homes for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
years.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the contrary,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
offenders are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
and
of course
legislators
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have rigorous punishments for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
others safe.

I'm definitely with the second part and
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
would back to way if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them and punish them
Consider replacing "in a sufficient way" with the adverb for "sufficient"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a sufficient way
and
obviously
this approach can be beneficial for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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