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Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. jWy1
People often think that social work is a very important activity especially for teenagers these days. It can be beneficial in a way and maybe even cause disturbance. Nowadays due to lack of people doing community work, people are of an opinion that teenagers should indulge themselves in community work for free during their free time. In this essay, We are going to elaborate the merits and demerits of doing this. Firstly, teenagers these days are very actively busy in their daily activities including studies, projects and assignments. They barely have any time left to get involved in any community work. Moreover, for the teenagers who are willing to participate often find it not very rewarding. For instance, if a teenager is interested to teach unprivileged children, he or she should get a recognition that is worth his/her time. On the other hand, It is very essential for teenagers to get themselves exposed to such activities. As, it improves their confidence and groomes their personality. Furthermore, they become more aware of the most recent challenges of the society. Getting involved in social work helps the society and also brings harmony. To conclude, Community work in general is a very good idea but it being unpaid doesn't make it worth at all. If not paid then, there should be a certain recognition that will in turn help the teenagers in later stages and will also attract their contribution.
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People
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often
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think
that social
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work
is a
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very
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important
activity
especially
for
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teenagers
these days. It can be beneficial in a way and maybe even cause disturbance. Nowadays due to lack of
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people
doing
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community
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work
,
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people
are of an opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
should indulge themselves in
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community
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work
for free during their free time. In this essay, We are going to elaborate the merits and demerits of doing this.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
these days are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
actively
busy in their daily activities including studies, projects and assignments. They
barely
have any time
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left
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in any
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community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
Moreover
, for the
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teenagers
who are willing to participate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
find it not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
rewarding.
For instance
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenager
is interested
to teach unprivileged children, he or she should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a recognition
that is
worth his/her time.

On the other hand
, It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential for
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teenagers
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
themselves exposed to such activities. As, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
their confidence and
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "grooms", the plural form of the noun 'groom'?
groomes
their personality.
Furthermore
, they become more aware of the most recent challenges of the society. Getting involved in social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the society and
also
brings harmony.

To conclude
,
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Community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in general
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it being unpaid doesn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it worth at all. If not paid then, there should be a certain recognition that will in turn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
in later stages and will
also
attract their contribution.

IELTS essay Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
237 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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