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It has been more than 30 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. Discuss your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It has been more than 30 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. Discuss your opinion. Aqdl
Certain individuals think that investments in space research are spending of money. I disagree with this suggestion because Earth’s problems depends on space exploration. It’s not a secret, that there are many problems on our planet such as diseases, hunger, climate change, wars, water an land pollution. It could be seemed that first of all the government need to resolve these major issues. Nevertheless, due to navigation system people can observe climate change and give a forecast about crop capacity and land which are suitable for farmland. Also some scientists is trying to look for a way to send to the space the enormous quantity of the waste which aren’t recycled. Furthermore we should realize that about 100 years later our Earth will not be available for our life. It could be happened because of asteroid collided with the planet or atomic bomb explosion, disappearance of the resources needed for human organism. That’s why there are many researches about colonization of other planets. Moreover we should not forget that we can watch TV and listen to the radio on the satellite connection. We are used to using GPS in our androids every day. Due to space technologies people develop the new chemical elements, compounds, low of physics in space. It leads our science on the higher level. In conclusion the new knowledge received from space discovery could help in creation of the new technologies, possibilities and knowing in other spheres. I believe that the long-term future of the human race should be space and that it represents an important life insurance for our continued survival, as it can prevent the extinction of humanity by colonizing other planets.
Certain individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that investments in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
research are spending of money. I disagree with this suggestion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Earth’s problems depends on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
exploration.

It’s not a secret, that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems on our planet such as diseases, hunger, climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, wars, water
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "land pollution".
an land pollution
. It could
be seemed
that
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
first of all
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
need to resolve these major issues.
Nevertheless
, due to navigation system
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can observe climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
and give a forecast about crop capacity and land which are suitable for farmland.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
scientists is trying to look for a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
the enormous quantity of the waste which aren’t recycled.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
we should realize that about 100 years later our Earth will not be available for our life. It could
be happened
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of asteroid collided with the planet or atomic bomb explosion, disappearance of the resources needed for human organism. That’s why there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
researches about colonization of other planets.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
we should not forget that we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
TV and listen to the radio on the satellite connection. We are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to using GPS in our androids every day.

Due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
technologies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
develop the new chemical elements, compounds, low of physics in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
. It leads our science on the higher level.

In conclusion
the new knowledge received from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
discovery could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in creation of the new technologies, possibilities and knowing in other spheres.

I believe that the long-term future of the human race should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
and that it represents an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
life insurance for our continued survival, as it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the extinction of humanity by colonizing other planets.

IELTS essay It has been more than 30 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. Discuss your opinion.

Essay
  American English
8 paragraphs
276 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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