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Some people believe that smart phones are destroying social interaction today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that smart phones are destroying social interaction today. 7DB2
People has various views about impact on social interaction by the use of smart phones these days. Some people believe that smart phones undermine social interaction, and some disagrees. In my opinion, I disagree that smart phones are harmful to human connection and this essay is going to discuss why I disagree. The primary reasons why I believe smart phone is beneficial to social interaction is because it has no district limitation. We can use smart phone easily contact people overseas and to maintain relationship. For instance, there are a great number of domestic helpers working abord from Indonesia or Thailand to Hong Kong. They may only have one to two chances in a year to visit their family. In this situation, smart phones become a powerful tool for them to keep contacts with their family members by video call and text messages. Moreover, using smart phones allow people not only can uphold relationships, but it can also allow people to meet new friends. There are numerous smart phone apps in the market to connect people with strangers such as tinder, Instagram and wechat, which can effectively enlarge a person’s social circle. People is no longer restricted to meet friends at school or office but also by smart phones apps. However, a number of people argues that due to smart phones. people are reluctant to meet and chat with others face to face. Therefore, there may be less genuine talk between people and eventually diminish social interaction. My personal view is that smart phones is a one of the tools to connect people and this is being misused, it may lead to negative impact. If we can use it properly, we can definitely enjoy its advantages to increase bonding between people. In conclusion, I firmly believe that smart phones are beneficial to improve human relationship when it is used correctly.
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People
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
various views about impact on
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social
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interaction
by the
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use
of
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smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
these days.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
undermine
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social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interaction
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disagrees. In my opinion, I disagree that
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smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are harmful to human connection and this essay is going to discuss why I disagree.

The primary reasons why I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interaction
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has no district limitation. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
easily
contact
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people
overseas and to maintain relationship.
For instance
, there are a great number of
Did you mean "domestics"?
domestic
helpers working
Possible spelling mistake found.
abord
from Indonesia or Thailand to Hong Kong. They may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have one to two chances in a year to visit their family. In this situation,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
become a powerful tool for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
contacts with their family members by video call and text messages.

Moreover
, using
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smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
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people
not
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only
can uphold relationships,
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but
it can
also
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allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
new friends. There are numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
apps in the market to connect
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people
with strangers such as tinder, Instagram and
Possible spelling mistake found.
wechat
, which can
effectively
enlarge a person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
circle.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
no longer restricted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
friends at school or office
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
apps.

However
, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argues that due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
people
are reluctant to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and chat with others face to face.
Therefore
, there may be less genuine talk between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
eventually
diminish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interaction
. My personal view is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
is a one of the tools to connect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and this is
being misused
, it may lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact. If we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it
properly
, we can definitely enjoy its advantages to increase bonding between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In conclusion
, I
firmly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are beneficial to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
human relationship when it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
correctly
.

IELTS essay Some people believe that smart phones are destroying social interaction today.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
310 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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