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some parents believe that the cell phones are harmful to children under 10 year old, while others disagree. To what extent do you agree?

some parents believe that the cell phones are harmful to children under 10 year old, while others disagree. Blb2V
It is known that technology and technological devices play a major role in our life. One of them is a cell phone and it is unseparatable part of our life. Nowadays, it is a habit for most people. Regarding to this topic, there are same notions. For instance, how much time we should use it or which age groups it is necessisty. Definitely, there is an important problem for children, especially under 10 years, about using telephone. Some people believe that chhildren who are under 10 shouldn't commerce to play cell phone although other people think deversely. From my point view, using this device result in many different problems for children. There are some reasons of my idea, two of which are concerned to physical and mental improvment and affecting their social life.
It
is known
that technology and technological devices play a major role in our life. One of them is a cell phone and it is
unseparatable
part of our life. Nowadays, it is a habit for most
people
.
Regarding to
this topic, there are same notions.
For instance
, how much time we should
use
it or which age groups it is
necessisty
. Definitely, there is an
important
problem for children,
especially
under 10 years, about using telephone.
Some
people
believe that
chhildren
who are under 10 shouldn't commerce to play cell phone although other
people
think
deversely
. From my point view, using this device result in
many
different
problems for children. There are
some
reasons of my
idea
, two of which
are concerned
to physical and mental
improvment
and affecting their social life.
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IELTS essay some parents believe that the cell phones are harmful to children under 10 year old, while others disagree.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
133 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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