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Some parents believe in skillset, while others believe in range of subjects.

Some parents believe in skillset, while others believe in range of subjects. XyR3q
Parents desire for their children to achieve big. Some are of the opinion that schools should work on children’s skillset, while others think that providing them with a variety of subjects is better for them to excel in future. I believe that polished skills can win you good opportunities but it also important that skills relevant to area of interest are emphasized on which can only happen once students know the subject they want to take forward after they have gained enough knowledge. On one hand, people think it would be better if schools focus on polishing children’s skillset so that they are able to apply them effectively once they are out in the practical world. Furthermore, skillful students would be able earn better and relatively at early stages since there are a lot jobs in market that are more interested in skillset than degree or theoretical knowledge. So, enhancing skills in early academic years means gaining expertise in that skill in a relatively shorter time. On the other hand, there are some people who think that it is better if the students are taught various subjects since this would allow them to identify their interests. If a student doesn’t know where their interest lies and is only focused on learning a fixed set of skills, they wouldn’t be able to discover different opportunities. It is easier to learn new things at early years of life since everything is new, so no unlearning needs to be done, as compared to the later stages when ample work has been done on one skill and it is later realized as a mistake. Therefore, providing range of subjects is better to keep options open. To conclude, developing skillset in the subject of interest is important as that would help in keeping the motivation and desire to learn alive otherwise things will get mundane.
Parents desire for their children to achieve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
are of the opinion that schools should work on children’s
Possible spelling mistake found.
skillset
, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that providing them with a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
for them to excel
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
. I believe that polished
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
can win you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
opportunities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
It seems that a verb is missing after "it". Please verify.
it
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
relevant to area of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
are emphasized
on which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
happen once
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
know the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
they want to take forward after they have gained
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
knowledge.

On one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it would be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
if schools focus on polishing children’s
Possible spelling mistake found.
skillset
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they are able to apply them
effectively
once they are out in the practical world.
Furthermore
, skillful
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students
would be
The preposition 'to' is required in front of the verb 'earn'.
able earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
and
relatively
at early stages since there are
If you mean a great quantity, use "a lot of jobs"?
a lot jobs
in market that are more interested in
Possible spelling mistake found.
skillset
than degree or theoretical knowledge.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, enhancing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in early academic years means gaining expertise in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
in a
relatively
shorter time.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are taught
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
since this would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to identify their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interests
. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
doesn’t know where their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
lies and is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focused on learning a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
set of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, they wouldn’t be able to discover
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opportunities. It is easier to learn new things at early years of life since everything is new,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
no unlearning needs to
be done
, as compared to the later stages when ample work has
been done
on one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
and it is later realized as a mistake.
Therefore
, providing range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
options open.

To conclude
, developing
Possible spelling mistake found.
skillset
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as that would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in keeping the motivation and desire to learn alive
otherwise
things will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
mundane.
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IELTS essay Some parents believe in skillset, while others believe in range of subjects.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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