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Some education expert believe that educational institute should add one more topic of art in his accademic as they are also impt part of education From my perspective i agree with above state,ent and my point are discussed in the upcoming paragraphs

Some education expert believe that educational institute should add one more topic of art in his accademic as they are also impt part of education From my perspective i agree with above state, ent and my point are discussed in the upcoming paragraphs GkDg

Some education expert believe that educational institute should add one more topic of art in his academic as they are also important part of education From my perspective i agree with above statement and my point are discussed in the upcoming paragraphs There are several reasons why additional subject should be intervened in schools. To embark with the foremost one is distress your mind and rejuvenate. pupil feels burden while studying the vital subject like science maths and many more, adding an non academic subject will help students to free up their mind and also help in quick decision making and freshen up that help u to focus more on studies and perform better. furthermore, adding the non curriculum activity along with the academic help students chossing varied field on carrier. some pupil have inbuild talent of singing or playing cricket, this will help them

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
Some
 education expert believe that educational institute should This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :accrue
add
 one more topic of art in his academic as they are also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:vitalcriticalessential
important
 part of education

From my perspective Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.I
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquiesce
agree
 with above statement and my point are discussed
 in the upcoming paragraphs

There are several reasons why additional subject should be intervened
 in schools. To embark with the foremost one is distress your mind and rejuvenate. This sentence does not start with an uppercase letterPupil
pupil
 feels burden while studying the vital subject like science Possible spelling mistake. 'maths' is British English.math
maths
 and This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
many
 more, adding Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'a
an
It appears that a hyphen is missing.non-academic
non academic
 subject will You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
 students to free up their mind and also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
 in quick This word is normally spelled with hyphen.decision-making
decision making
 and freshen up that You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
 u to focus more on studies and perform better.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letterFurthermore
furthermore
, adding the non curriculum activity along with the academic You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
 students Possible spelling mistake found.crossingchoosing
chossing
 varied field on carrier. This sentence does not start with an uppercase letterSome
some
 pupil have Possible spelling mistake found.inbuiltin build
inbuild
 talent of singing or playing cricket, this will You use this word too often, consider replacing it withadviceuseservicesupportcomforthand
help
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraphthem.them!them?them:them,them;
them

IELTS essay Some education expert believe that educational institute should add one more topic of art in his accademic as they are also impt part of education From my perspective i agree with above state, ent and my point are discussed in the upcoming paragraphs

Essay

American English

3 paragraphs

144 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
Include an introduction and conclusion
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 5.5

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.5

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.0

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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