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Society is based on rules and laws. If individuals were free to do whatever they want to do, it could not function. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement?

The laws and rules make a society complete. If people are set free to do whatever they want to do then it won't function, so there needs to rules and laws which individuals need to follow to make a society stronger. I understand that every society wants to form rules and laws, and which the superiors think that needs to be followed in order to make things work in the right and ethical way, but i personaly don't agree on the point because from my experience and point of view, I believe that we humans are born to be free and wild, and the more someone tries to control us, the more we lose control, or go in depression from the pressure of peers. There are many researches which has shown the relatonship between the human's desire to do something when they are set free, and while they are bounded. When someone feels stressed due to the boundries created by other people then the person is not able to put much focus and interest on that particular thing. For instance, if there was a rule made by society that every person had to choose engeeniering or to be a doctor then how creativity would emerge? What i mean to say is that if a person is not allowed to think out of the box then there is no way the creativity will increase among individuals. Furthermore, I would say that rules and laws isn't what makes a society functioning, but the freedom to do what people love and desire, and be accepted for that. People who follow their heart has always been threat to the society. Especialy the society full of insecure and iggnorant people. In conclusion, some people believe that society is only functioning when people follow rules and laws, and not set free to follow their heart which i donot agree on as we humans are born to be free and wild. We humans are not birds, or like other animals that can be kept in cages. Creativity emerges when we let people explore their mind.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
complete. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are set
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
to do whatever they want to do then it won't function,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there needs to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
which individuals need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
stronger.

I understand that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
wants to form
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
, and which the superiors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that needs to
be followed
in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
things work in the right and ethical way,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
i
personaly
don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
on the point
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
from my experience and point of view, I believe that we humans
are born
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
and wild, and the more someone tries to control us, the more we lose control, or go in depression from the pressure of peers.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
researches which has shown the relatonship between the human's desire to do something when they
are set
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
, and while they
are bounded
. When someone feels
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
due to the boundries created by other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
then the person is not able to put much focus and interest on that particular thing.
For instance
, if there was a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rule
made by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
that every person had to choose engeeniering or to be a doctor then how creativity would emerge? What i mean to say is that if a person is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
out of the box then there is no way the creativity will increase among individuals.

Furthermore
, I would say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
isn't what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
functioning,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the freedom to do what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and desire, and be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
for that.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
their heart has always been threat to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
Especialy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
full of insecure and iggnorant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
functioning when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
, and not set
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
their heart which i donot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
on as we humans
are born
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
and wild. We humans are not birds, or like other animals that can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
in cages. Creativity emerges when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
explore their mind.
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IELTS essay Society is based on rules and laws. If individuals were free to do whatever they want to do, it could not function. with the above statement?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
348 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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