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Smaller family sizes in developed countries

Smaller family sizes in developed countries kjm6K
Nowadays modern couples prefer to have a nuclear family in contrast to the past decades, especially in western countries. Many people argue that there are particular reasons for the change in family sizes. In this essay, I will discuss the main ones for this fact. The main idea of living with a small family is creating quality time for yourself. In the era we are living in, education level is higher compared to the last generation. Therefore, people are aware of what they want and mostly childcare is not one of them. As it seems, being a part of an extended family brings a lot of responsibilities such as taking care of dependants. Also, it is argued by many that affording a kid’s cost of living especially at adolescence needs a lot of money. Because of that, parents have to deal with overwork. As I mentioned, many people are focused on their growth and having high living standards. As a consequence of that, countries have qualified workers for their companies. In other words, the community which includes well-educated people makes the country strikingly livable. As a result, society is more delighted in this way due to people have better communication skills which ensure fewer problems in daily life. Correspondingly, people are more lenient to each other because of less stress in their routine day. To sum up briefly, having smaller families has indisputable good effects on society. Each person lives independent life and this creates improved, economically strong, relaxed and comfortable atmosphere.
Nowadays modern couples prefer to have a nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
in contrast
to the past decades,
especially
in western countries.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that there are particular reasons for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
sizes. In this essay, I will discuss the main ones for this fact.

The main
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
with a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is creating quality time for yourself. In the era we are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in, education level is higher compared to the last generation.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are aware of what they want and
mostly
childcare is not one of them. As it seems, being a part of an extended
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
responsibilities such as taking care of
Possible spelling mistake found.
dependants
.
Also
, it
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
that affording a kid’s cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
especially
at adolescence needs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of that, parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
deal with overwork.

As I mentioned,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are focused
on their growth and having high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standards. As a consequence of that, countries have qualified workers for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
In other words
, the community which includes well-educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
makes
the country
strikingly
livable.
As a result
, society is more delighted in this way due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have better communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
which ensure fewer problems in daily life.
Correspondingly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more lenient to each other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
in their routine day.

To sum up
briefly
, having smaller
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
has indisputable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
effects on society. Each person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
independent life and this creates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
,
economically
strong, relaxed and comfortable atmosphere.
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IELTS essay Smaller family sizes in developed countries

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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