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Since the technology is cheaply accessible, parents find it convenient to engage their children with the same. What problem does it cause and what solution can you suggest?

Since the technology is cheaply accessible, parents find it convenient to engage their children with the same. What problem does it cause and what solution can you suggest? poRd
With all the constant developments in technology, children’s ways of living have greatly changed. Parents often take benefits of those advantages to manipulate their offspring. This incorrect habit can lead to numerous challenges in the future. Due to the overload of work people todays undergo, the time spent with their kids is unquestionably getting lesser and lesser. When kids have to stay without adults on sight, they tend to be left with smart gadgets, for example, smartphones and tablets. As guardians believe that it is the best method to keep them under control. Perhaps, some even misuse these gadgets as incentive rewards for the children, given the fact that they are well-behaved. Owing to these fallacies, minors will possibly grow up with some misconceptions. There are plenty of studies showing that kids should not be engaged with technology during their young age since it can extremely distract the sense of concentration. However, nowadays, it is inevitable to avoid them, now that these things are parts of humans’ lifestyles. Although starting the first step can be highly complicated, nothing would not alter without this foremost process. Parents should adjust their schedule to prioritise more in their descendants in order to reduce the use of the distracting devices. All in all, technological equipment is two-edged. Even if it is always a pleasant idea to ease out our on-the-go lives, the use toward adolescence somehow needs to be controllably limited.
With all the constant developments in technology, children’s ways of living have
greatly
changed
. Parents
often
take benefits of those advantages to manipulate their offspring. This incorrect habit can lead to numerous challenges in the future.

Due to the overload of work
people
todays
undergo, the time spent with their kids is
unquestionably
getting lesser and lesser. When kids
have to
stay without adults on sight, they tend to be
left
with smart gadgets,
for example
, smartphones and tablets.
As
guardians believe that it is the best method to
keep
them under control. Perhaps,
some
even misuse these gadgets as incentive rewards for the children,
given
the fact that they are well-behaved. Owing to these fallacies, minors will
possibly
grow up with
some
misconceptions.

There are
plenty
of studies showing that kids should not
be engaged
with technology during their young age since it can
extremely
distract the sense of concentration.
However
, nowadays, it is inevitable to avoid them,
now
that these things are parts of humans’ lifestyles. Although starting the
first
step can be
highly
complicated, nothing would not alter without this foremost process. Parents should adjust their schedule to
prioritise
more in their descendants in order to
reduce
the
use
of the distracting devices.

All in all, technological equipment is two-edged. Even if it is always a pleasant
idea
to
ease
out our on-the-go
lives
, the
use
toward adolescence somehow needs to be
controllably
limited.
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IELTS essay Since the technology is cheaply accessible, parents find it convenient to engage their children with the same. What problem does it cause and what solution can you suggest?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
237 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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  • Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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