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research indicates that characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. which do you consider to be the major influence?

research indicates that characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. which do you consider to be the major influence? NrwPN
The latest trend in psychological studies has revealed that a person’s characteristics are highly likely to be predetermined by their genes. However, some advocate that a person’s personality and development is more shaped by life experiences rather than heredity. I firmly believe the latter. First, life experience plays a more essential role in forming a person’s traits than genes. In other words, each individual distinguishes himself from others more due to after-birth experiences which vary from person to person. For instance, a person who has travelled to a range of countries tends to be more inclusive and open-mined than those without any overseas experiences. Therefore, it is the life experiences rather than genes that decide who we are. Further to this point, a great many personal traits which contribute to further development can only be acquired via learning through trial and error in real life. One such example is diligence. The characteristic of being fully committed is unarguably cultivated by showing persistence and commitment when confronting countless problems in life. However, no scientific proof has been foundto suggest that diligence is a trait which is programmed into the genes. Last but not least, a personal characteristic is more likely to be influenced by external environment. Undeniably, a child who grows up in a well-educated family is more likely to possess qualities such as integrity and honesty than that from a drug-abusive one. Conversely, a child exposed to gangs and criminal activity has a greater tendency to resort to violence or even get involved in illegal trafficking later on than that from a well-disciplined environment. Therefore, it is self-evident that external influence has a significant impact on moulding a person’s character. To sum up, I strongly believe a person’s character and development is mainly determined by life experience instead of genetic inheritance based on the above mentioned arguments
The latest trend in psychological studies has revealed that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
characteristics are
highly
likely to
be predetermined
by their genes.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advocate that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
personality and development is more shaped by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
rather
than heredity. I
firmly
believe the latter.

First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
plays a more essential role in forming a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
traits than genes.
In other words
, each individual distinguishes himself from others more due to after-birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
which vary from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
who has travelled to a range of countries tends to be more inclusive and open-mined than those without any overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
.
Therefore
, it is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
rather
than genes that decide who we are.

Further
to this point, a great
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
personal traits which contribute to
further
development can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be acquired
via learning through trial and error in real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. One such example is diligence. The characteristic of being
fully
committed is
unarguably
cultivated by showing persistence and commitment when confronting countless problems in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
However
, no scientific proof has been
Possible spelling mistake found.
foundto
suggest that diligence is a trait which
is programmed
into the genes.

Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, a personal characteristic is more likely to
be influenced
by external environment.
Undeniably
, a child who grows up in a well-educated family is more likely to possess qualities such as integrity and honesty than that from a drug-abusive one.
Conversely
, a child exposed to gangs and criminal activity has a greater tendency to resort to violence or even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in illegal trafficking later on than that from a well-disciplined environment.
Therefore
, it is self-evident that external influence has a significant impact on
Possible spelling mistake. 'moulding' is British English.
moulding
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
character.

To sum up, I
strongly
believe a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
character and development is
mainly
determined by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
instead
of genetic inheritance based on the above mentioned arguments
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IELTS essay research indicates that characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. which do you consider to be the major influence?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
306 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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