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Pollution of rivers, lakes and seas is a major concern for people who seek to protect the environment. What are the possible causes of water pollution, and what effects does this have on animal life and human society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Pollution of rivers, lakes and seas is a major concern for people who seek to protect the environment. What are the possible causes of water pollution, and what effects does this have on animal life and human society? rEm6
In the present age, some people who care for environment expressed a main concern about water pollution in rivers seas and lake. In this essay, I intend to explore the possible causes of this kind of pollution and how it impacts to animal and human-being in this planet. It is obvious that there are many possible factors which can be a cause of water pollution, but from my experience, i think there are two main factors. First and foremost, business activities play a key role of creating the water pollution if they do not have an efficient system in order to control wastes of their production line. For example, there is a giant oil company in Thailand that spilled a chenical waste into the Gulf of Thailand and it lead to death in a plenty of marine life. Second factor is activities of household which is located close to the water resources such as canals and rivers. Many researchers discover that some people who live in this area often let the waste product into the canal according to their unproper behaviours. They think that it is more convenience for them to make it this way but they do not think about the effect that can be a serious problem in the near future. For instance, evaporation of chemical from waste product in the water. To summarise, several factors are able to create the pollution of water sources and finally damage a life-cycle of animal and human. I believe that we should take measures including both some of business and household activities can be root causes of water pollution.
In the present age,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who care for environment expressed a main concern about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
in rivers seas and lake. In this essay, I intend to explore the possible causes of this kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and how it impacts to animal and human-being in this planet.

It is obvious that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
which can be a cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
from my experience,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
there are two main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
.
First
and foremost, business activities play a key role of creating the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
if they do not have an efficient system in order to control
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastes
of their production line.
For example
, there is a giant oil
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
in Thailand that spilled a
Possible spelling mistake found.
chenical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
into the Gulf of Thailand and it
Did you mean "leads"?
lead
to death in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of marine life.

Second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factor
is activities of household which
is located
close to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
resources such as canals and rivers.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
researchers discover that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in this area
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
product into the canal according to their
Possible spelling mistake found.
unproper
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is more convenience for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it this way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about the effect that can be a serious problem in the near future.
For instance
, evaporation of chemical from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
product in the water.

To
Possible spelling mistake. 'summarise' is British English.
summarise
, several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
are able to create the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
sources and
finally
damage a life-cycle of animal and human. I believe that we should take measures including both
Consider using "some business" or "some of the business".
some of business
and household activities can be root causes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
.
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IELTS essay Pollution of rivers, lakes and seas is a major concern for people who seek to protect the environment. What are the possible causes of water pollution, and what effects does this have on animal life and human society?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Pollution of rivers, lakes and seas is a major concern for people who seek to protect the environment. What are the possible causes of water pollution, and what effects does this have on animal life and human society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.