Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

personal celebration vs national celebration

personal celebration vs national celebration jR5Q1
National Day plays a wonderful role in everyone's life. There are many national days like Independence Day, Republic Day, Yoga day etc. Currently, people celebrate their personal days rather than national ceremonies. Here, I would like to keep both my thoughts and my perception in mind. There are various points that can shore up my point. First and foremost, people's busiest lifestyles are responsible for forgetting national celebrations. For example, in the era of inflation, people are busy in the rat race to obtain more and more money to manage the astronomical periphery. Therefore, they do not celebrate national celebrations due to lack of time. In addition, recreational sources entice people to spend more time, thus becoming introverted who are not interested in participating in social activities. What's more, the generation gap and lack of time are away from older people to younger people, so young people do not get to know about the culture as well as the national festival. As a result, they do not know the importance of national ceremonies. Manifold marks can be inserted in a later view. First, individual celebrations are more enjoyable than national celebrations. For example, individual celebrations include multi-cuisine, dance as well as other recreational activities while national ceremonies include poetry, patriotic songs, a recitation of history exhibitions, thus allowing people to celebrate their individual celebrations rather than national ceremonies. From my belief, there is no doubt that a personal celebration is more enjoyable than a national celebration. But I think teachers celebrate national festivals in school so that students get to know about their culture and tradition. To recapitulate, celebrating national festivals by the people is the best way to get knowledge about their culture, so people should celebrate national celebrations.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
National
Day plays a wonderful role in everyone's life. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
days like Independence Day, Republic Day, Yoga day etc.
Currently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrate
their personal days
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
ceremonies. Here, I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
both my thoughts and my perception in mind. There are various points that can shore up my point.
First
and foremost,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's busiest lifestyles are responsible for forgetting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
.
For example
, in the era of inflation,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are busy in the rat race to obtain more and more money to manage the astronomical periphery.
Therefore
, they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
due to lack of time.
In addition
, recreational sources entice
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to spend more time,
thus
becoming introverted who are not interested in participating in social activities. What's more, the generation gap and lack of time are away from older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know about the culture
as well
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
festival.
As a result
, they do not know the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
ceremonies.

Manifold marks can
be inserted
in a later view.
First
, individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
are more enjoyable than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
.
For example
, individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
include multi-cuisine, dance
as well
as other recreational activities while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
ceremonies include poetry, patriotic songs, a recitation of history exhibitions,
thus
allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrate
their individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
ceremonies.

From my belief, there is no doubt that a personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebration
is more enjoyable than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebration
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
teachers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
festivals in school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know about their culture and tradition.

To recapitulate, celebrating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
festivals by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
knowledge about their culture,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrations
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay personal celebration vs national celebration

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts