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people in all modern societies use drugs, but today’s youth are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugs, and at an increasing early age. Some sociologist claim that parents and other members of the society often set a bad example.

people in all modern societies use drugs, but today’s youth are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugs, and at an increasing early age. Some sociologist claim that parents and other members of the society often set a bad example. 9L6K3
Indeed, the usage of legal and illegal drugs, mainly in the youth has increased exponentially in the last few years and this will have life-changing effects on them. Mostly in the starting, these were introduced by their friends and family but then they became habitual for the use. Another reason can be the amount of stress and tension people received from peers. All these can make a huge impact on them which in return lowers their grades. To start with, with the boon in social media and entertainment industries, many youngsters have been exposed to violent movies and series which is impacting their behavior including drug abuse. Other reasons can be the introduction of drugs from the family members. Lastly, the usage of illegal drugs is mainly promoted in the parties where their friends are also consuming as well as forcing others to have some. The usage of drugs in unprescribed amount can change their lives as most of the students starts getting a low score in the exams which will have some challenging effects on their lives as they will not be able to secure a good job and become unemployed. Meanwhile, the usage of drugs can damage their lungs and kidneys which is quite irreversible in nature. In conclusion, consumption of drugs have can change a person lives meanwhile, the usage of illegal drugs should be banned by the government and the drug addicts should be sent to the re-habitat center so that they can improve their lifestyle and this will make the world a better place to live in as it uses to be in earlier days.
Indeed
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of legal and illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
,
mainly
in the youth has increased
exponentially
in the last few years and this will have life-changing effects on them.
Mostly
in the starting, these
were introduced
by their friends and family
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
then they became habitual for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. Another reason can be the amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and tension
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
received from peers. All these can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a huge impact on them which in return lowers their grades.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, with the boon in social media and entertainment industries,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
youngsters have
been exposed
to violent movies and series which is impacting their behavior including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
abuse. Other reasons can be the introduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
from the family members.
Lastly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
is
mainly
promoted in the parties where their friends are
also
consuming
as well
as forcing others to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
unprescribed
amount can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
as most of the students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
getting a low score in the exams which will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
challenging effects on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
as they will not be able to secure a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job and become unemployed. Meanwhile, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
can damage their lungs and kidneys which is quite irreversible in nature.

In conclusion
, consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
have can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
meanwhile, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
should
be banned
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
addicts should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to the re-habitat center
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their lifestyle and this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the world a better place to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
to be in earlier days.
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IELTS essay people in all modern societies use drugs, but today’s youth are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugs, and at an increasing early age. Some sociologist claim that parents and other members of the society often set a bad example.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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