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Parents should encourage their children to spend less time in study and more time in physical activities .to what extent do you agree or disagree.

Parents should encourage their children to spend less time in study and more time in physical activities. JYgke
It is debatable issue regarding to study as well as physical fitness. some individual think that guardians should encourage tiny tots in order to spend more time on physical activities rather study. Although physical activities best way to reduce the strees yet without paying attention on study children can not obtain success in study as well as secure to own future. To embark with why children should spend more time on physical activities. A healthy body is the foundation of every think. As physical activities is best way of entertainment with this not only reduce the strees but also breaks the monotony. When children would spend more time in outdoor activities that it help the children in physical growth and they become mentally healthy. also they can easily concerntrate on study without any burden. For instance a survey was conducted by canda University which shows that 70% children more healthy who take part in different kind of sports activities. moreover if children would be more healthy they can difficult task and will not feel tired. On the other hand healthy body is more crucial for any hard work. in the modern world education is more crucial for achieve success in every field. since they would spend more time in outdoor activities they can distract from study and give merly perfence to activities rather study because they can do physical activities in any time but they need study in specific time. In conclusion healthy body is more important however without paying attention on study children can not acquire success in life and not secure own future
It is debatable issue
The phrase 'regarding to' is not correct. Use "regarding" or "regard to".
regarding to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
fitness.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
some
individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that guardians should encourage tiny tots in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
rather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
A determiner is probably missing here: "activities the best".
activities best
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
strees
yet
without paying attention on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can not obtain success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
as well
as secure to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
future. To embark with why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
body is the foundation of every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
A determiner is probably missing here: "is the best".
is best
way of entertainment with this not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
strees
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
breaks the monotony. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in outdoor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
growth and
they become mentally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
also
they can
easily
Possible spelling mistake found.
concerntrate
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
without any burden.
For instance
a survey
was conducted
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
canda
University which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that 70%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
moreover
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would be more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
they
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
can difficult
task and will not feel tired.
On the other hand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
body is more crucial for any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
the modern world education is more crucial for achieve success in every field.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
since
they would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in outdoor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
they can distract from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
and give
Possible spelling mistake found.
merly
Possible spelling mistake found.
perfence
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
rather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
In conclusion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
body is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
however
without paying attention on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can not acquire success in life and not secure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
future
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IELTS essay Parents should encourage their children to spend less time in study and more time in physical activities.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
264 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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