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overweight is a serious problem

overweight is a serious problem eRy5B
Currently, the number of overweight people who are facing serious health problems is increasing rapidly. Most people with obesity are caused by overeating, not exercising regularly and not getting enough sleep. The imbalance between energy intake and energy expenditure is a problem of many people. Dietary energy intake exceeds the body's energy needs, so energy is in excess and is converted into fat that accumulates in organs. When energy is not released, fat is kept in the body for a long time, leading to obesity and other diseases such as diabetes, cancer, etc. People who are prone to obesity are those who have a habit of consuming fast food, high-energy food, eat a lot of fat, eat a lot of fried food, drink a lot of soft drinks, alcohol. . . The best solution to this problem is to drink more water, fruit juice instead of drinking water carbonated, eat many small meals a day, limit starch and fat and exercise regularly. Lack of sleep is also one of the reasons why people are prone to obesity. When you don't get enough sleep, you will often feel hungry, crave foods with a lot of sugar. Afterthat, it will lead to uncontrolled appetite. That is the cause of overweight and obesity. There is a study that says that when you sleep you can burn from 300 to 500 calories per night. Therefore, getting 8 hours of sleep a day is essential. In summary, if there is a reasonable diet and healthy lifestyle, the number of people with obesity will decrease over time
Currently
, the number of overweight
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are facing serious health problems is increasing
rapidly
. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with obesity
are caused
by overeating, not exercising
regularly
and not getting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
sleep.

The imbalance between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
intake and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
expenditure is a problem of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Dietary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
intake exceeds the body's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
needs,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
is in excess and
is converted
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
that accumulates in organs. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
is not released,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
in the body for a long time, leading to obesity and other diseases such as diabetes, cancer, etc.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who are prone to obesity are those who have a habit of consuming
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, high-energy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, eat a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
, eat a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of fried
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, drink a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of soft drinks, alcohol.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
The best solution to this problem is to drink more water, fruit juice
instead
of drinking water carbonated, eat
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
meals a day, limit starch and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
and exercise
regularly
.

Lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
is
also
one of the reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are prone to obesity. When you don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
, you will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
feel hungry, crave
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of sugar.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Afterthat
, it will lead to uncontrolled appetite.
That is
the cause of overweight and obesity. There is a study that says that when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
you can burn from 300 to 500 calories per night.
Therefore
, getting 8 hours of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
a day is essential.

In summary, if there is a reasonable diet and healthy lifestyle, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with obesity will decrease over time
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IELTS essay overweight is a serious problem

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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