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Overpopulation Is becoming problem especially in urban centers, what causes it and what can be done to solve this problem

In the recent years the number of people is increasing sharply which leads to overpopulation in many Urban centers around the world, and it is considered one of the biggest problems and this essay I will outline some of the main causes of this problem and try to give some possible solutions in order to tackle this issue. To start with, the life in urban cities is quite hectic which means there are much more better facilities compared to countryside As a result a lot of people are trying to settle down in urban cities leaving their homes. The solution is for the government to allocate some budget for developing lifestyle in countryside by establishing some more amenities like in urban cities. As a consequence people start being occupied with their domains locally without moving in urban centers so it can help cut down on the number of people. Another problem is that the lack of professional teachers and tuitions. Parents in suburbs don't want their children to be ignorant but the condition in suburbs turns out to be rather devastated their teachers have no enough qualification to teach their children. The government should hire some more professional teachers to suburbs so that they will be able to provide sufficient knowledge to the children in countryside. In conclusion overpopulation has become a major problem in urban centers due to the reasons such as insufficient facilities and the lack of professionals unless the government distribute fond for countryside and hire teachers people will continue suffering this problem.
In the recent years the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is increasing
sharply
which leads to overpopulation in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Urban
centers around the world, and it
is considered
one of the biggest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
and this essay I will outline
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
main causes of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
and try to give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible solutions in order to tackle this issue.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, the life in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
cities is quite hectic which means there are much
Use only "better" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more better
facilities compared to countryside
As a result
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are trying to settle down in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
cities leaving their homes. The solution is for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to allocate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
budget for developing lifestyle in countryside by establishing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
more amenities like in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
cities. As a consequence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
being occupied
with their domains
locally
without moving in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
centers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down on the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is that the lack of professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
tuitions
. Parents in suburbs don't want their children to be ignorant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the condition in suburbs turns out to be
rather
devastated their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
have no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
qualification to teach their children. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should hire
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
more professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
to suburbs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they will be able to provide sufficient knowledge to the children in countryside.

In conclusion
overpopulation has become a major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
centers due to the reasons such as insufficient facilities and the lack of professionals unless the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
distribute fond for countryside and hire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will continue suffering this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
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IELTS essay Overpopulation Is becoming problem especially in urban centers, what causes it and what can be done to solve this problem

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
256 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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