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Overpopulation in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem.What is the cause of this?How can this problem be solved?

Overpopulation in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem. What is the cause of this? How can this problem be solved? BAk6
“Prevention is better than cure” is a controversial topic that raise argument among both authorities and citizens around the world. Some people believe that we should focus the investment on medical treatments while many insist that diseases treating are more expensive than preventative methods so the society should spend more money on preventing plans. I definitely agree with this point of view since some medicines are way too costly and at present human race is unable to cure manifold of diseases. This essay will discuss my perspective. Firstly, the treatment processes for some specific diseases such as cancer or diabetes are so pricey which make underprivileged people cannot afford to pay for. In addition, isolation strategies to prevent the widespread infection of virus cost an arm and a leg for the government. At the same time, it is cheaper when investing on the research into annihilating cancer risk factors or manufacturing vaccine for the virus. Secondly, sometime it is too late to cure a sickness when its symptoms start appearing. SARS, HIV, H1N1, Ebola are the examples for the global pandemic which killed millions of people in the world. There is no cure for these epidemics after they turn from incubation periods into latent states. Because citizens’ health is the most important factor of a nation, preventing human loss is an indispensable mission no matter how costly the price is. In conclusion, although researching medical treatments is important, developing diseases preventing method should not be underestimated and the government need to invest a big budget on it.
“Prevention is better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cure”
is a controversial topic that raise argument among both authorities and citizens around the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that we should focus the investment on medical treatments while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
insist that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
treating are more expensive than preventative methods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the society should spend more money on preventing plans. I definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this point of view since
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
medicines are way too costly and at present human race is unable to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cure
manifold of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
. This essay will discuss my perspective.

Firstly
, the treatment processes for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
such as cancer or diabetes are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
pricey which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
underprivileged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
cannot afford to pay for.
In addition
, isolation strategies to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the widespread infection of virus cost an arm and a leg for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
. At the same time, it is cheaper when investing on the research into annihilating cancer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
factors or manufacturing vaccine for the virus.

Secondly
, sometime it is too late to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cure
a sickness when its symptoms
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
appearing. SARS, HIV, H1N1, Ebola
The singular proper name 'Ebola' must be used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "is", "was", "were".
are
the examples for the global pandemic which killed millions of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the world. There is no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cure
for these epidemics after they turn from incubation periods into latent states.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
citizens’ health is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor of a nation, preventing human loss is an indispensable mission no matter how costly the price is.

In conclusion
, although researching medical treatments is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
preventing method should not
be underestimated
and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
need to invest a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
budget on it.
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IELTS essay Overpopulation in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem. What is the cause of this? How can this problem be solved?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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