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Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in rich countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in rich countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer. n6VLE
A number of obese people, in particular in developed/wealthy countries, has been rising increasingly in the recent years. While breaking consumerist’s habits seems to be an intractable problem, powers that be have to make an effort to nip the problem in the bud by increasing the prices for products detrimental to society’s well-being. Unfortunately for the humanity, the desire to gorge ourselves on fatty and unhealthy food is deeply ingrained in our DNA, since our ancestors used to stuff themselves as soon as they could find any source of calories. With regard to this, it is virtually impossible to get rid of bad habits developed 70, 000 years ago. Therefore, there might well be only two solutions to the problem. First of all, it might be worth a try to impose norms beneficial to public’s fitness. For instance, in some schools of Orenburg, Russia teachers are supposed to report to doctors in case they notice any dangerous changes in children’s health/ weight. Parents and children on the verge of being overweight are to be talked in private in order to take timely measures and avoid risks. This new strategy has already resulted in a sharp drop of overweight students. However, if these rules were to be applied to modify adult’s habits, the statistics would certainly be less positive. In case of grown-up individuals, draconic measures is the only way to go, as the language of money is the only language we all seem to speak. There have already been some new taxes introduced in order to avoid consuming too much sugar and sugar drinks, after that, recent research concluded consumption of sugar dropped by 20% in the USA alone. I believe fast food must also be subject to much higher taxes to make it more difficult to succumb to temptation of buying it. In conclusion, craving for delicious food has always held sway over common sense. That is why, authorities had better not wait for individuals to start controlling their own behaviour and just put up/ raise prices for products ruining our health.
A number of obese
people
,
in particular
in developed/wealthy countries, has been rising
increasingly
in the recent years. While breaking consumerist’s habits seems to be an intractable problem, powers that be
have
to
make
an effort to nip the problem in the bud by increasing the prices for products detrimental to society’s well-being.

Unfortunately for the humanity, the desire to gorge ourselves on fatty and unhealthy food is
deeply
ingrained in our DNA, since our ancestors
used
to stuff themselves as
soon
as they could find any source of calories. With regard to this, it is
virtually
impossible to
get
rid of
bad
habits developed 70, 000 years ago.
Therefore
, there might well be
only
two solutions to the problem.
First of all
, it might be worth a try to impose norms beneficial to public’s fitness.
For instance
, in
some
schools of
Orenburg
, Russia teachers
are supposed
to report to doctors in case they notice any
dangerous
changes
in children’s health/ weight. Parents and children on the verge of being overweight are to
be talked
in private in order to take timely measures and avoid
risks
. This new strategy has already resulted in a sharp drop of overweight students.
However
, if these
rules
were to
be applied
to modify adult’s habits, the statistics would
certainly
be less
positive
.

In case of grown-up individuals,
draconic
measures is the
only
way to go, as the language of money is the
only
language we all seem to speak. There have already been
some
new taxes introduced in order to avoid consuming too much sugar and sugar drinks, after that, recent research concluded consumption of sugar dropped by 20% in the USA alone. I believe
fast
food
must
also
be subject to much higher taxes to
make
it more difficult to succumb to temptation of buying it.

In conclusion
, craving for delicious food has always held sway over common sense.
That is
why, authorities had better not wait for individuals to
start
controlling their
own
behaviour
and
just
put up/ raise prices for products ruining our health.
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IELTS essay Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in rich countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
343 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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