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Nowadays most people are not fit and active enough, compared to the past. What are the main causes of this situation? Suggest some possible solutions.

These days, the number of people who suffer from obey-related diseases arising with a frightening rate. This is evident from the fact that people are no longer as physically healthy and active as it was several decades ago. There are many people who argue that the substantial effects on this trend are generated by the technological advancements and the way they shape styles of living. To tackle this problem, implementing governmental policies and the establishment of health facilities will be considered in this essay. To begin, there is no doubt that technologies are beneficial in many ways but there is also serious negative impact on public health. Such devices like smartphones shape the way individuals socialize and entertain. The vast majority of smartphone users prefer surfing the net chatting, watching videos or images on networking websites, rather than communicating face-to-face and socializing via sports activities. To counter this, educational or advertisement programs aimed to increase the enlightenment of the hazard of such a lifestyle. For instance, South Korea has implemented policy, which includes rehabilitation centers for the Internet-addicted and encouraging sports programs for students In addition, the nature of jobs all over the globe has moved from physically demanding to mental oriented. The result of this is that billions of people have to lead a sedentary lifestyle. To illustrate this point, office workers in modern companies spend 12 hours in front of computer monitors in a static position. Consequently, a large chunk of people does not obtain a necessary physical activity and face health issues. For this, providing offices and residential areas with fitness facilities would be the most adequate solution as it will encourage people to exercise. As is clear, targeted governmental propaganda/education programs and setting up more fitness clubs are two efficient ways to make people form healthy habits.
These days, the number of
people
who suffer from obey-related diseases arising with a frightening rate. This is evident from the fact that
people
are no longer as
physically
healthy and active as it was several decades ago. There are
many
people
who argue that the substantial effects on this trend
are generated
by the technological advancements and the
way
they shape styles of living. To tackle this problem, implementing governmental policies and the establishment of health facilities will
be considered
in this essay.

To
begin
, there is no doubt that technologies are beneficial in
many
ways
but
there is
also
serious
negative
impact on public health. Such devices like smartphones shape the
way
individuals socialize and entertain. The vast majority of smartphone users prefer surfing the net chatting, watching videos or images on networking websites,
rather
than communicating face-to-face and socializing via sports activities. To counter this, educational or advertisement programs aimed to increase the enlightenment of the hazard of such a lifestyle.
For instance
, South Korea has implemented policy, which includes rehabilitation centers for the Internet-addicted and encouraging sports programs for
students


In addition
, the nature of jobs all over the globe has
moved
from
physically
demanding to mental oriented. The result of this is that billions of
people
have to
lead a sedentary lifestyle. To illustrate this point, office workers in modern
companies
spend 12 hours in front of computer monitors in a static position.
Consequently
, a large chunk of
people
does not obtain a necessary physical activity and face health issues. For this, providing offices and residential areas with fitness facilities would be the most adequate solution as it will encourage
people
to exercise.

As is
clear
, targeted governmental propaganda/education programs and setting up more fitness clubs are two efficient
ways
to
make
people
form healthy habits.
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IELTS essay Nowadays most people are not fit and active enough, compared to the past. What are the main causes of this situation? Suggest some possible solutions.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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