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Not enough students around the world choose to study science subjects at university. What are the reasons for this? What impact does this issue have on society?

Not enough students around the world choose to study science subjects at university. What are the reasons for this? What impact does this issue have on society? 7QbY
It is a fact that the importance of science subjects have dramatically increased due to the start of the 4th Industrial Revolution. However, current students do not prefer studying science over the past few years. This can result to slow development in the society. One of the main reason this situation has occurred is that science has become more complex to study with the start of the 4th industry revolution era. The government has acknowledged the importance of science and have upgraded teenager science books to higher educations. This has not only lowered the interest for students but have also made it complicated for students to understand science. However, few students have had interest in this. The second reason would be the increasing trend of visualized culture. There has been an enormous amount of entertainments that have came out with the development of technology. For example, the movie industry, nowadays, can produce many virtual scenes with the help of computers. People can visualize and put movements to dinosaurs or dragons by using Solid Works programs in computers. This has triggered people’s interest in movie industries and other unrealistic figures. To sum up, having complicated science subjects learnt at school nowadays and the growing interest in visualized culture are the 2 reasons that have concluded to students avoiding science subjects. I think this can sluggish the development rate and make people in the society become ignorant in daily science at homes in the near future.
It is a fact that the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
subjects have
dramatically
increased due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the 4th Industrial Revolution.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
do not prefer studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
over the past few years. This can result to slow development in the society.

One of the main reason this situation has occurred is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has become more complex to study with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the 4th industry revolution era. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has acknowledged the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and have upgraded
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
books to higher educations. This has not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
lowered the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
have
also
made it complicated for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to understand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
.
However
, few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have had
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in this.

The second reason would be the increasing trend of visualized culture. There has been an enormous amount of entertainments that have
Use past participle here: "come".
came
out with the development of technology.
For example
, the movie industry, nowadays, can produce
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
virtual scenes with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of computers.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
can visualize and put movements to dinosaurs or dragons by using Solid Works programs in computers. This has triggered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in movie industries and other unrealistic figures.

To sum up, having complicated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
subjects
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt at
school nowadays and the growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in visualized culture are the 2 reasons that have concluded to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
avoiding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
subjects. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this can sluggish the development rate and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the society become ignorant in daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
at homes in the near future.
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IELTS essay Not enough students around the world choose to study science subjects at university. What are the reasons for this? What impact does this issue have on society?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
244 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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