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New technologies and ways of buying and selling are transforming the lives of consumers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

New technologies and ways of buying and selling are transforming the lives of consumers. with this opinion. A1O3
I agree that modern technology has changed the lives of consumers to buy and sell goods. Throughout the history the trading methods have been diverted from using gold to banknotes as a tool for exchange. However, holding a a card instead of paper money can be remarkable change too. Nowadays, you can shop easily. People are lucky enough so they are thankful for the invention of money. Imagine, you can now exchange money paper by gold and also you will have a chance to buy other things with the rest of your funds of money that's a great benefit for the development of money which is a new technology in this regard. The invention of bank also has made the way people shop more interesting than they thought. ATM machine is the most part of every shop store you can use it buy give your credit card for buy or sell electronically without even seen any money paper exchanged. To conclude, new development of money exchange and trading has transformed the way people buy or sell things instead of old fashioned currency like gold there now is a paper money and credit card holding your cash on it. Thus, I strongly agree that without the invention of modern technology for trading consumers will never be as satisfied as they're today
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that modern technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of consumers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
and sell
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
. Throughout the history the trading methods have
been diverted
from using gold to banknotes as a tool for exchange.
However
, holding
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "a" or "a" is left.
a a
card
instead
of paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
can be remarkable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
too.

Nowadays, you can shop
easily
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are lucky
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they are thankful for the invention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Imagine, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
exchange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
paper by gold and
also
you will have a chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
other things with the rest of your funds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
that's a great benefit for the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
which is a new technology in this regard.

The invention of bank
also
has made the way
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
shop more interesting than they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
.
This phrase is redundant ('M' stands for 'machine'). Use simply "ATM".
ATM machine
is the most part of every shop store you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
give your credit card for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
or sell
electronically
without even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
paper exchanged.

To conclude
, new development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
exchange and trading has transformed the way
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
or sell things
instead
of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
old fashioned
currency like gold there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
is a paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and credit card holding your cash on it.
Thus
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that without the invention of modern technology for trading consumers will never be as satisfied as
Did you mean "their"?
they're
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
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IELTS essay New technologies and ways of buying and selling are transforming the lives of consumers. with this opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
219 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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