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myopia a threat to the eyes

myopia a threat to the eyes wOkGY
So grateful to the American scientist Benjamin Franklin for inventing glasses for people with low vision because without him, how many people would not have been able to see clearly the beautiful scenes in life. According to medical doctor Denize Atan, senior lecturer in ophthalmology at the University of Bristol UK, myopia has become common and rapidly increasing over the past few decades to become a global disease. There are currently 14 billion people in the world with myopia, also 20 of the global population, but this number will become much more complicated in 10 years. It could be 30, and 50 of the world's population must wear glasses because of myopia from 2050. Vietnam has about 3 million school children with refractive errors, most of which are nearsighted. Myopia is a global concern, but do people really understand it? It is a type of refractive error. People who have this problem have poor vision and need the help of eyeglasses. The symptoms to know if you have myopia are squinting, eye fatigue The causes of myopia can originate from daily activities, education, use of electronic devices, congenital Myopia brings quite a lot of disadvantages. Such as can't see the signs clearly, can't read fluently, always have to use glasses, the cost of medical treatment is quite expensive, many jobs require good eyesight Each type of disease has its own treatment, so myopia also has its own way. For example, reduce time using electronic devices, do eye-roll exercises, massage your eyes, change your daily lifestyle, eat foods that are good for your eyes, etc. These solutions can be done on your own but take a long time, or you can go to the doctor to get the best advice, besides there can also be an eye surgery. Eyes are a gift that every human being is given by nature. So everyone has to take good care of their own eyes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
grateful to the American scientist Benjamin Franklin for inventing glasses for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with low vision
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
without him, how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would not have been able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
clearly
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
scenes in life. According to medical doctor
Possible spelling mistake found.
Denize
Possible spelling mistake found.
Atan
, senior lecturer in ophthalmology at the University of Bristol UK,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
myopia
has become common and
rapidly
increasing over the past few decades to become a global disease.

There are
currently
14 billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the world with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
myopia
,
also
20 of the global population,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this number will become much more complicated in 10 years. It could be 30, and 50 of the world's population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
wear glasses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
myopia
from 2050. Vietnam has about 3 million school children with refractive errors, most of which
are nearsighted
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Myopia
is a global concern,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
really
understand it?

It is a type of refractive error.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who have this problem have poor vision and need the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of eyeglasses. The symptoms to know if you have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
myopia
are squinting,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eye
fatigue The causes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
myopia
can originate from daily activities, education,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of electronic devices, congenital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Myopia
brings quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
disadvantages. Such as can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the signs
clearly
, can't read
fluently
, always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
glasses, the cost of medical treatment is quite expensive,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
jobs require
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
eyesight


Each type of disease has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
treatment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
myopia
also
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
time using electronic devices, do eye-roll exercises, massage your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eyes
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
your daily lifestyle, eat foods that are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eyes
, etc. These solutions can
be done
on your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
take a long time, or you can go to the doctor to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the best advice,
besides
there can
also
be an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eye
surgery.

Eyes are a gift that every human being is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by nature.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
everyone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
care of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
eyes
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IELTS essay myopia a threat to the eyes

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
319 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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