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Many teenagers today spend a large amount of money on consumer goods and entertainment without worrying about the cost even though they may earn a little or no money themselves. Why do you think young people sometimes spend their money irresponsibly and what are the consequences?

Many teenagers today spend a large amount of money on consumer goods and entertainment without worrying about the cost even though they may earn a little or no money themselves. Why do you think young people sometimes spend their money irresponsibly and what are the consequences? KPK3
The overspending of teenagers is one of the most popular situations in these days. This essay will examine the cause and effect of overspending in the young generation. The reason behind this unforeseen consequence is because of the advanced economy. People get more wealthy, with bigger earnings/income, which allow their children a more comfortable life. The youngsters, thanks to their parents, have little to worry about their finance, thus, are free to do whatever they want and getting into shopping spree. Another reason is that young people tend to surf the internet often and they can see a lot of interesting items on there, and purchasing items from the internet nowadays is easy. So, they got attracted immediately. This trend may lead to some negative effects. They could go broke in just a week or less without their parents’ support and it leads to loan, which is not the thing that everybody wants to hear. Or for undergraduate student, it can affect their study since they have to bear a financial burden, too much which will make them lose focusing on the lecture, lead to bad mark. Another consequence is that parents may also suffer from this, if their child spend too much money without thinking. In conclusion, overspending in teenagers is one of the most concerning problem in any household. If the family don’t teach them about how to spend money, the percentage of broken teenagers will keep rising in the next few years and it will put a detrimental influence on their family and themselves.
The overspending of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
is one of the most popular situations in these days. This essay will examine the cause and effect of overspending in the young generation.

The reason behind this unforeseen consequence is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the advanced economy.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more wealthy, with bigger earnings/income, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
their children a more comfortable life. The youngsters, thanks to their parents, have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
to worry about their finance,
thus
, are free to do whatever they want and getting into shopping spree. Another reason is that young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to surf the internet
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
often and
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
interesting items on there, and purchasing items from the internet nowadays is easy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
attracted immediately.

This trend may lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects. They could go broke in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a week or less without their parents’ support and it leads to loan, which is not the thing that everybody wants to hear. Or for undergraduate student, it can affect their study since they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
bear a financial burden, too much which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them lose focusing on the lecture, lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
mark. Another consequence is that parents may
also
suffer from this, if their child spend too much money without thinking.

In conclusion
, overspending in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
is one of the most concerning
Please check whether a plural form of 'problem' should be used.
problem
in any household. If the family don’t teach them about how to spend money, the percentage of broken
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
rising in the
next
few years and it will put a detrimental influence on their family and themselves.
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IELTS essay Many teenagers today spend a large amount of money on consumer goods and entertainment without worrying about the cost even though they may earn a little or no money themselves. Why do you think young people sometimes spend their money irresponsibly and what are the consequences?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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