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Many people think that mobile phones should be banned in public places such as libraries, shops and public transport. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people think that mobile phones should be banned in public places such as libraries, shops and public transport. madq
It is frequently argued that numerous humans ponder about prohibited mobile phones from community places such as reference libraries, shops, and municipal transport. Although they attract attention to disturb someone, they provide the safety of the young as parents can easily get in touch with them wherever they are. On the one hand, I believe that banned mobile phones could be beneficial because they attract attention and disturb someone. To be more precise, the signal of phones would be issued in public places as well as the movement of humans who talk or write messages on the phone annoyed someone. This is mainly because when you visit the reference library to be problematic to accept the information if the surround completes with an extra voice. To illustrate, psychologists confessed that utilize the devices on the municipal transport would be a factor to brain damage since conversation between two humans with some further sounds in ambit influence negatively. Thereby, if we prohibit mobile phones it brings avail and defends from diseases or harms as well. On the other hand, mobile phones provide the safety of the young as parents can easily get in touch with them wherever they are. In other words, they are multi-functional to use in order to inform someone also easily be turned to silent or vibrate the mode to not interrupt. This means that gadgets are being an inalienable part of our life so that seems like we do not envisage the future without them. For instance, it is supportive to report about emergence, accident which happened in public places or affords communication. Therefore, we hesitate to ban mobile phones. On balance, they attract attention to disturb someone but they provide the safety of the young as parents can easily get in touch with them wherever they are. It is highly recommended that they should restrict only significant places such as libraries but not everywhere.
It is
frequently
argued that numerous humans ponder about prohibited mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
from community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
such as reference libraries, shops, and municipal transport. Although they attract attention to disturb
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
, they provide the safety of the young as parents can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in touch with them wherever they are.

On the one hand, I believe that banned mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
could be beneficial
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they attract attention and disturb
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
. To be more precise, the signal of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
would
be issued
in public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
as well
as the movement of humans who talk or write messages on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
annoyed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
. This is
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when you visit the reference library to be problematic to accept the information if the surround completes with an extra voice. To illustrate, psychologists confessed that utilize the devices on the municipal transport would be a factor to brain damage since conversation between two humans with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
further
sounds in ambit influence
negatively
. Thereby, if we prohibit mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
it brings avail and defends from diseases or harms
as well
.

On the other hand
, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
provide the safety of the young as parents can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in touch with them wherever they are.
In other words
, they are multi-functional to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in order to inform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
The pronoun 'someone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "is", "was", "were".
be
turned to silent or vibrate the mode to not interrupt. This means that gadgets are being an inalienable part of our life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that seems like we do not envisage the future without them.
For instance
, it is supportive to report about emergence, accident which happened in public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
or affords communication.
Therefore
, we hesitate to ban mobile phones.

On balance, they attract attention to disturb
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they provide the safety of the young as parents can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in touch with them wherever they are. It is
highly
recommended that they should restrict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
such as libraries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not everywhere.
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IELTS essay Many people think that mobile phones should be banned in public places such as libraries, shops and public transport.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
318 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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