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Many people nowadays tend to marry and have children in their thirties rather than at a younger age. Is this a positive or negative development?

Many people nowadays tend to marry and have children in their thirties rather than at a younger age. Is this a positive or negative development? 2WVA
We are in a generation, which predominantly gives importance towards personal growth in career. By giving so, there are sacrifices made especially in their marital status. Two decades back, people got married as early in their twenties though they haven’t decided their definite career path. But, nowadays, priority is to get well settled as far as career and money is concerned before getting married. Though it makes sense to the lot of youngsters, I feel this as a negative development. On one hand most of the people insist, not having enough money as a big reason to delay their marriage. Marriage is not only just about their status getting changed, but also comes a huge responsibility towards running a family. This includes budgeting towards their food, clothes and shelter. Moreover, the future of them and their children starts at marriage and maintaining it steadily throughout their lifetime in all ups and downs needs mature decisions. Considering both the maturity required and the money to feed on, many people or getting married late on purpose. On the other hand, people who are concerned about the birth of their children prefer early marriage. Though there are many advancements in the medical field for childbirth, people who got married late still find it difficult to have a baby on their own. The children who are born from their parents early age tend to be more healthier than from the late married parents. The latter babies need special attention at their early age as their immunity system is not capable enough to withstand health issues. Keeping children’s health at the top priority, some people prefer early marriages. Not only physical health problems, but also children suffer from mental issues as they grow. Parents who prefer late marriage for money, eventually get used to it and forget to spend quality time with their children’s early age. Children expect their parents to be a part in drawing their picture, go on a fun ride, watching their favorite movies together and in their swimming classes. These disappointments affect them mentally. Also, parents being not healthy enough as their children grow misses all their achievements, which also in turn not only impact children but also the parents themselves mentally. In my opinion, despite regretting at the last minute for not having the right time or not being healthy enough to spend the right time with their children, getting married at least in the late twenties for the betterment of their next generation is the wise choice.
We are in a generation, which
predominantly
gives importance towards personal growth in career. By giving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, there are sacrifices made
especially
in their marital status. Two decades back,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
married as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
in their twenties though they haven’t decided their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
career path.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, nowadays, priority is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
well settled as far as career and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is concerned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
getting married. Though it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
sense to the lot of youngsters, I feel this as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development.

On one hand most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
insist, not having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
reason to delay their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Marriage
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
about their status getting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
a huge responsibility towards running a family. This includes budgeting towards their food, clothes and shelter.
Moreover
, the future of them and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
and maintaining it
steadily
throughout their lifetime in all ups and downs needs mature decisions. Considering both the maturity required and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to feed on,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or getting married
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
on purpose.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are concerned
about the birth of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
. Though there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advancements in the medical field for childbirth,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
married
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
still
find it difficult to have a baby on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are born
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
age tend to be
Use only "healthier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more healthier
than from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
married
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. The latter babies need special attention at their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
age as their immunity system is not capable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
to withstand health issues. Keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
health at the top priority,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
marriages.

Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
physical health problems,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
suffer from mental issues as they grow.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
,
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to it and forget to spend quality time with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
age.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to be a part in drawing their picture, go on a fun ride, watching their favorite movies together and in their swimming classes. These disappointments affect them mentally.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
being not healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
grow misses all their achievements, which
also
in turn not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
impact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
themselves mentally.

In my opinion, despite regretting at the last minute for not having the right time or not being healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enough
to spend the right time with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, getting married at least in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
twenties for the betterment of their
next
generation is the wise choice.
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IELTS essay Many people nowadays tend to marry and have children in their thirties rather than at a younger age. Is this a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
418 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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