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Many historical sites and museums are mainly visited by tourists, not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract local people to visit these historical sites and museums?

Many historical sites and museums are mainly visited by tourists, not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract local people to visit these historical sites and museums? 2WAk
Museums and historical places seem to be less attractive to local individuals than to visitors. it is crucial that we analyze the causes of this disturbing issue and explore the effective solution. In my opinion, there are multiple reasons behind this trend and the government should undertake certain steps to stimulate the local people to visit museums. There are number of reasons for this phenomenon. First and foremost, local people take this for granted. Secondly, visiting museums is not cheap, as to get admission to these places, visitors are often required to buy tickets. Since there are no new attractions, Local residents who have been to it once, do not wish to frequent it again and again. For example, a survey has revealed that out of 40 museums in India, only 2 of them provide concession to locals and no fee is being charged for children aged under 5 Years. In short, the lack of new attractions and ticket prices are some of the main reasons behind the scarcity of local visitors. Although the solutions are not simple, many steps can be taken by the government to alleviate the problem. To start with, new attractions ought to be organized by the authorities, which will persuade the local community to pay a visit. Additionally, special concession and offers should be introduced specifically aiming at the local people. For instance, Historical attractions should be once a week free for the locals and a 50% discount should also be introduced for children. Thus, it goes without saying that the introduction of new temptations and a drop in ticket prices will play an important role in the resolution. To conclude, this disturbing problem is attributed to many factors such as uninterested local people and expensive tickets. Nevertheless, I believe that many steps can be taken by the government, in order to mitigate the setback.
Museums and historical places seem to be less attractive to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
individuals than to visitors.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is crucial that we analyze the causes of this disturbing issue and explore the effective solution. In my opinion, there are multiple reasons behind this trend and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should undertake certain steps to stimulate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to visit museums.

There are number of reasons for this phenomenon.
First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take this for granted.
Secondly
, visiting museums is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
, as to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
admission to these places, visitors are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
required to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
. Since there are no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attractions
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Local
residents who have been to it once, do not wish to frequent it again and again.
For example
, a survey has revealed that out of 40 museums in India,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2 of them provide concession to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
and no fee is
being charged
for children aged under 5 Years. In short, the lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attractions
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
prices are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
main reasons behind the scarcity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
visitors.

Although the solutions are not simple,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
steps can
be taken
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to alleviate the problem. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attractions
ought to
be organized
by the authorities, which will persuade the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
community to pay a visit.
Additionally
, special concession and offers should
be introduced
specifically
aiming at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For instance
, Historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attractions
should be once a week free for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
and a 50% discount should
also
be introduced
for children.
Thus
, it goes without saying that the introduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
temptations and a drop in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
prices will play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in the resolution.

To conclude
, this disturbing problem
is attributed
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors such as uninterested
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and expensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
.
Nevertheless
, I believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
steps can
be taken
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, in order to mitigate the setback.
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IELTS essay Many historical sites and museums are mainly visited by tourists, not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract local people to visit these historical sites and museums?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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