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Many children nowadays are spending more and more time inside rather than outside. Is this a positive or negative trend ?

It is irrefutable that in this modern world, most of the youngsters prefer to play indoor activities due to advancement in technology and increasing crime rate, rather than going outside. In my eyes, this trend has detrimental effects on both physical and social life of a child. To commence with, children spend most of their time by watching television and playing computerised games. They are always sticked with their respective gadgets screen and are living sedentary lifestyle. As a result of lack of physical activities they suffer from severe health issues such as diabetes, obesity and heart diseases. In an research conducted worldwide, it was observed that around forty percents children between the age of ten to seventeen, were obese due to lack of exercise and eating unhealthy. Along with this, due to increasing trend of staying at home, juveniles are becoming less sociable. They are becoming introverts and are talking less even with their families. If they would not go outside of their homes or play with their friends in playground then, they will not learn important skills like team work. Moreover, young ones are becoming more aggressive as a result of less interaction with anyone. For instance, a cousin of mine has became assertive due to increasing usage of games and less contact with others. To recapitulate, although this situation has created drastic impacts on adolescents yet immediate steps are required to make sure that children have a rich diet of play experiences.

It is irrefutable that in this modern world, most of the youngsters prefer to play indoor activities You use this word too often, consider replacing it withscheduledowedoutstandingpayableexpectedoverdue
due
 to advancement in technology and increasing crime rate, rather
 than going outside. In my eyes, this trend has detrimental effects on both physical and social life of a child.

To commence with, children spend most of their time by watching television and playing Possible spelling mistake. ‘computerised’ is British English.computerized
computerised
 games. They are always Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean “stuck”, the past tense form of the verb ‘stick’?stuckstackedstickerstockedtickedslicked
sticked
 with their respective gadgets screen and are living sedentary lifestyle. As a result
 of lack of physical activities they suffer from severe health issues such as diabetes, obesity and heart diseases. In Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply “research”.research
an research
 conducted worldwide, it was observed
 that around forty percents children between the age of ten to seventeen, were obese You use this word too often, consider replacing it withscheduledowedoutstandingpayableexpectedoverdue
due
 to lack of exercise and eating unhealthy.

Along with this, You use this word too often, consider replacing it withscheduledowedoutstandingpayableexpectedoverdue
due
 to increasing trend of staying at home, juveniles are becoming You use this word too often, consider replacing it withfewer
less
 sociable. They are becoming introverts and are talking You use this word too often, consider replacing it withfewer
less
 even with their families. If they would not go This phrase is redundant. Consider using “outside”.outside
outside of
 their homes or play with their friends in playground then, they will not learn This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:vitalcriticalessential
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :proficiencies
skills
 like team work. Moreover
, young ones are becoming more aggressive as a result
 of You use this word too often, consider replacing it withfewer
less
 interaction with anyone. For instance
, a cousin of mine has Use past participle here: “become”.become
became
 assertive You use this word too often, consider replacing it withscheduledowedoutstandingpayableexpectedoverdue
due
 to increasing usage of games and You use this word too often, consider replacing it withfewer
less
 contact with others.

To recapitulate, although this situation has created drastic impacts on Use a comma before ‘yet’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).adolescents,
adolescents
yet
 immediate steps are required
 to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
 sure that children have a rich diet of play experiences. 