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mamat kunem gandoni cnudt

mamat kunem gandoni cnudt g57e3
The 21st century is an era full of access to various opportunities. Nowadays, it is not necessary to have a work which mainly depends on physical abilities regardless, people can work sitting at offices and even at home and still have high salaries. However, some believe that job satisfaction is more important than its security, while others think a permanent one is better. This essay will discuss my opinion and will give some shreds of evidence. If the employment enjoying had disappeared, humanity would have already suffered from depression. It is contributed with the first need – delighting the thing that you do. In the book ‘Habits for life’ which was written by Shon Young, mentions: ‘that the place where you work you must get the most satisfaction even if it is not well paid and stable’. And I definitely agree with this statement because if you want to be happy, you have to get the most enjoyable employment. Furthermore, there is plenty of different professions and everyone can find something for themselves On the other hand, the majority argues, that constant occupation is mandatory for success. This statement is affiliated with the demand to be in safety that sometimes can be harmful to career growth if the huge amount of the Earth’s population is getting stuck in factories and does nothing creative. Subconsciously, they suspect that they can not achieve higher positions that is why they prevent themselves from risking. In conclusion, I have perused a huge amount of researches and revealed that about a half of the population is without the satisfaction of their work and that is why they fell into depression and I think that governments should better pay attention to the pleasure of the employment instead of the safety.
The 21st century is an era full of access to various opportunities. Nowadays, it is not necessary to have a
work
which
mainly
depends on physical abilities regardless,
people
can
work
sitting at offices and even at home and
still
have high salaries.
However
,
some
believe that job satisfaction is more
important
than its security, while others
think
a permanent one is better. This essay will discuss my opinion and will give
some
shreds of evidence.

If the employment enjoying had disappeared, humanity would have already suffered from depression. It
is contributed
with the
first
need
delighting the thing that you do. In the book ‘Habits for life’ which
was written
by
Shon
Young, mentions: ‘that the place where you
work
you
must
get
the most satisfaction even if it is not well paid and stable’. And I definitely
agree
with this statement
because
if you want to be happy, you
have to
get
the most enjoyable employment.
Furthermore
, there is
plenty
of
different
professions and everyone can find something for themselves

On the other hand
, the majority argues, that constant occupation is mandatory for success. This statement
is affiliated
with the demand to be in safety that
sometimes
can be harmful to career growth if the huge amount of the Earth’s population is getting stuck in factories and does nothing creative.
Subconsciously
, they suspect that they can not achieve higher positions
that is
why they
prevent
themselves from risking.

In conclusion
, I have perused a huge amount of researches and revealed that about a half of the population is without the satisfaction of their
work
and
that is
why they fell into depression and I
think
that
governments
should better pay attention to the pleasure of the employment
instead
of the safety.
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IELTS essay mamat kunem gandoni cnudt

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
294 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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