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Learn to manage money as an adult

Learn to manage money as an adult Ek5Q
It is widely argued that in order to achieve financial security people have to understand how to manage their money wisely. This essay will examine some key points on how adults can organize their finance well. Firstly, to start managing their finance people should learn how to live a simple lifestyle. Simple living may be characterized by individuals being satisfied with what they have rather than want. By this, I mean adults should not spend more money than they earned. There are many goods and services that seem important to be purchased. However, people should be selective to decide the things they really need such as food or drinking and any utilities in order to avoid personal debt. Secondly, which is no less important to be noticed is the way people use their disposable income. As young people especially those who have job security, it is suggested to deposit the amount of money left from the wages to be allocated as a profitable investment. This leftover budget, for instance, could be spent to make passive income with real estate investing or even can be used to start a side business. In summary, there is some financial advice that could be learned to take care of money which is trying to live a frugal lifestyle and running a start-up business. Both are a great option for individuals to spend their money properly.
It is
widely
argued that in order to achieve financial security
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
understand how to manage their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
wisely
. This essay will examine
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
key points on how adults can organize their finance well.

Firstly
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
managing their finance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should learn how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a simple lifestyle. Simple living may
be characterized
by individuals
being satisfied
with what they have
rather
than want. By this, I mean adults should not spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
than they earned. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and services that seem
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should be selective to decide the things they
really
need such as food or drinking and any utilities in order to avoid personal debt.

Secondly
, which is no less
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
be noticed
is the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their disposable income. As young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
especially
those who have job security, it
is suggested
to deposit the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
from the wages to
be allocated
as a profitable investment. This leftover budget,
for instance
, could
be spent
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
passive income with real estate investing or even can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a side business.

In summary, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
financial advice that could
be learned
to take care of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
which is trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a frugal lifestyle and running a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
-up business. Both are a great option for individuals to spend their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
properly
.
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IELTS essay Learn to manage money as an adult

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
231 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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