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Last time that I cried. When you cried in the last time and why?

Last time that I cried. When you cried in the last time and why? mXV7L
Honestly, I cannot remember clearly when I cried last time. I had been believed crying is symbolic of the weakness. I tried so hard to force myself no cry. Even though many time I fail and end up with cry and cry, the next day I will forget what cause me cried. That is reason why I do not sure when is the last time I cry. Although I cannot definitely tell the time but I still remember the bad feeling. It is about the family issue. I know myself is not the favorite or even the good child comparing to the younger sister or the other cousin. I am independent and always like the black sheep. The ancient culture or idea always make me feel question why we have to do this. The ridiculous answer is “cause we have been doing for along time”, but who said you have to keep doing. The past is the past. Now we are in the twenty century, so what was was it was was. Taking about the ancient culture, one of them that always annoys me is the repaid to your parent. Due to give you birth, you must do whatever to response for their sake. You have to get the good grade, good job, high salary, and take care them nearly. Most Asian children are stucked in this idea. We never ask for life, you married and decided to have us. Sometimes I think I may not have a future because my life is for fulfill the other aspects. To sum up, the last time I cried is about the bad feeling in the Asian culture, but when? I cannot tell date exactly, may be in this week, may be two or three days ago. Because the feeling still fresh. It hards to hold and I end up with a lots of tear and used tissue. Hopefully, I might not cry because of this again.
Honestly
, I cannot remember
clearly
when I cried last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. I had
been believed
crying is symbolic of the weakness. I tried
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to force myself no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cry
.
Even though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I fail and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cry
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cry
, the
next
day I will forget what cause me cried.
That is
reason why I do not sure when is the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I cry.

Although I cannot definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
still
remember the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
feeling. It is about the family issue. I know myself is not the favorite or even the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
child comparing to the younger sister or the other cousin. I am independent and always like the black sheep. The ancient culture or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me feel question why we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do this. The ridiculous answer is “
Did you mean "because we"?
cause we
have been doing for along
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time”
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
who said you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
doing.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
past is the past.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
we are in the twenty century,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
what
Possible typo: you repeated a word
was was
it
Possible typo: you repeated a word
was was
.

Taking about the ancient culture, one of them that always annoys me is the repaid to your parent. Due to give you birth, you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
do whatever to response for their sake. You
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
grade,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job, high salary, and take care them
nearly
. Most Asian children are
Possible spelling mistake found.
stucked
in this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
. We never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
life, you married and decided to have us.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
I may not have a future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
my life is for fulfill the other aspects.

To sum up, the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
I cried is about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
feeling in the Asian culture,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when? I cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
date exactly, may be in this week, may be two or three days ago.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
the feeling
still
fresh. It
Possible spelling mistake found.
hards
to hold and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up with a
Possible agreement error. The noun tear seems to be countable; consider using: "lots of tears".
lots of tear
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
tissue.
Hopefully
, I might not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cry
because of this
again.
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IELTS essay Last time that I cried. When you cried in the last time and why?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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