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it is illegal to bring chewing gum to Singapore. Spitting it out can earn you a fine and stores are not allowed to sell it. Chewing gum poses a serious public health risk. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

it is illegal to bring chewing gum to Singapore. Spitting it out can earn you a fine and stores are not allowed to sell it. Chewing gum poses a serious public health risk. with this statement? Kl0rM
In Singapore chewing gum is prohibited. You have to pay fine for spitting it out and also shops are not permitted to sell it. There are many dangerous causes by it. I agree that chewing gum should be prohibited. To begin with, it has been observed that chewing gum is prohibited in many countries like Singapore, Korea and many more countries because of it's causes. The main cause of chewing gum is that when people spitting it in public area. By throwing it out viruses and bacteria can get spread and it can spread illness. For example, when people hawk who is suffering from dangerous health issues then by spitting it's bacteria get spread in air and it may be happen that another person will be affected by it and when people spit it in public area it take to much affect to remove it because it stuck anywhere. Furthermore, many schools are not allowing to chew chewing gum because many students do not know about how to consume it and they eat like all food they eat and after swallowing it may be happen that it stuck in some body part and it is not removed without surgical activity. For example, in Delhi one child swallowed chewing gum because he do not know about how to consume it after that it stuck in liver and he had to do big operation to remove it. So it is very harmful for not only children but also for adult. To put in a nutshell, I pen down saying that it is dangerous to chew chewing gum. However, I strongly believe that it should be banned in all countries and especially for children.
In Singapore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chewing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gum
is prohibited
. You
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay fine for spitting it out and
also
shops are not permitted to sell it. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
causes by it. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chewing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gum
should
be prohibited
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it has
been observed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chewing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gum
is prohibited
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries like Singapore, Korea and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Did you mean "of its causes"?
of it's causes
. The main cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chewing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gum
is that when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
spitting it in public area. By throwing it out viruses and bacteria can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
spread and it can spread illness.
For example
, when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
hawk who is suffering from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
health issues then by spitting
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (short form of 'it is')?
it's
bacteria
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
spread in air and it
Did you mean "maybe" (= perhaps)?
may be
Consider using the past participle "happened"?
happen
that another person will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by it and when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
spit it in public area it
Did you mean "takes"?
take
Did you mean "too"?
to
much affect to remove it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it stuck anywhere.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
schools are not allowing
Did you mean "chewing"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'allow' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to chew
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chewing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gum
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students do not know about how to consume
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
it and
they eat like all food they eat and after swallowing it
Did you mean "maybe" (= perhaps)?
may be
Consider using the past participle "happened"?
happen
that it stuck in
Did you mean "somebody"?
some body
part and it is not removed without surgical activity.
For example
, in Delhi one child swallowed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chewing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gum
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he
The pronoun 'he' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "does", "did".
do
not know about how to consume it after that it stuck in
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
liver and
he had to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
operation to remove it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful for not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for adult. To put in a nutshell, I pen down saying that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
to chew
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chewing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gum
.
However
, I
strongly
believe that it should
be banned
in all countries and
especially
for children.
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IELTS essay it is illegal to bring chewing gum to Singapore. Spitting it out can earn you a fine and stores are not allowed to sell it. Chewing gum poses a serious public health risk. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
281 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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