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It is compulsory for children to attend school between the ages of 5 and 16. Many people are in favor of raising the age at which children must start their schooling to 6 or 7, and the age at which they are allowed to stop to 17 or 18. People of this view believe it is important for young children to spend more time with their parents, while they believe teenagers would gain more from staying in school longer. To what extent do you agree with this view.

It is compulsory for children to attend school between the ages of 5 and 16. Many people are in favor of raising the age at which children must start their schooling to 6 or 7, and the age at which they are allowed to stop to 17 or 18. People of this view believe it is important for young children to spend more time with their parents, while they believe teenagers would gain more from staying in school longer. wj5l
It is an undeniable fact that children are the backbone and future of the nation. In many countries, ruling body has implemented some rules and regulations for the study age of kids. In the present time, the youngest age is 5 years for kids to initiate their study in schools. However, a number of individuals believe that no children below 6 or 7 years should be allowed to take admission in schools. I think this is a conservative statement to make and I will cast light on my views in the upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, there are a plethora of contributing factors that support my view. First and foremost, in the modern era, as most of the parents are working professionals, consequently it will be very difficult for guardians to manage their time if kids are not allowed in schools before 7 years. It will affect their professional as well as family life. Secondly, it has been proved scientifically that children grasp the things faster and quickly. So, it is better for them to attend the school at early age. In addition to this, late admission will surely affect their higher study and job prospects. As, nowadays multinational companies look only the younger minds. Furthermore, in many competitive examinations, an age criterion is fixed. So, it will become a hurdle for adolescent to compete with others. On the other hand, many masses are in favor of late education of kids. It is a notion that parents are the first mentor of their child and play an indispensible role to inculcate good habits and moral ethics in younger minds. So, they suggest that it would be beneficial for the mental and physical growth of the kids, if they spend more time with their guardians. But in the modern time, crèches and play schools take care of the kids in a better way. These centres bestow a healthy and hygiene environment like that of home. Moreover, it is also believed that teenagers should spend more time in school to gain more. It can be true up to some extent, but there may be some better options for them. Besides academic, some extracurricular activities such as dance and sports classes will proves as a milestone for them to learn skills of their choice rather than to spend a long time in school. To recapitulate, I would like to reiterate that the suitable age for study is 5 to 16 year. It will not be better for toddlers to initiate their schooling at the age of seven Certainly, it will produce a negative impact on them throughout the life.
It is an undeniable fact that children are the backbone and future of the nation. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries, ruling body has implemented
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
. In the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, the youngest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
is 5 years for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to initiate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
However
, a number of individuals believe that no children below 6 or 7 years should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to take admission in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this is a conservative statement to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
and I will cast light on my views in the upcoming paragraphs.

On the one hand, there are a plethora of contributing factors that support my view.
First
and foremost, in the modern era, as most of the parents are working professionals,
consequently
it will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult for guardians to manage their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
7 years. It will affect their professional
as well
as family life.
Secondly
, it has
been proved
scientifically
that children grasp the things faster and
quickly
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
for them to attend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
at early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
.
In addition
to this, late admission will
surely
affect their higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
and job prospects.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
, nowadays multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
look
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the younger minds.
Furthermore
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
competitive examinations, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
criterion is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it will become a hurdle for adolescent to compete with others.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
masses are in favor of late education of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
. It is a notion that parents are the
first
mentor of their child and play an
Possible spelling mistake found.
indispensible
role to inculcate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
habits and moral ethics in younger minds.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they suggest that it would be beneficial for the mental and physical growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
, if they spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their guardians.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in the modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, crèches and play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
take care of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
way. These
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
bestow a healthy and hygiene environment like that of home.
Moreover
, it is
also
believed that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
should spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
to gain more. It can be true up to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there may be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
options for them.
Besides
academic,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extracurricular activities such as dance and sports classes will proves as a milestone for them to learn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of their choice
rather
than to spend a long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in school.

To recapitulate, I would like to reiterate that the suitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is 5 to 16
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. It will not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
for toddlers to initiate their schooling at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of seven

Certainly
, it will produce a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on them throughout the life.
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IELTS essay It is compulsory for children to attend school between the ages of 5 and 16. Many people are in favor of raising the age at which children must start their schooling to 6 or 7, and the age at which they are allowed to stop to 17 or 18. People of this view believe it is important for young children to spend more time with their parents, while they believe teenagers would gain more from staying in school longer.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
437 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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