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It is an inevitable fact that internet plays vital role in this age of technology. While it contains a great deal of beneficial aspects, it also holds a numerous of demerit.

It is an inevitable fact that internet plays vital role in this age of technology. While it contains a great deal of beneficial aspects, it also holds a numerous of demerit. GlBgB
It is an inevitable fact that internet plays vital role in this age of technology. While it contains a great deal of beneficial aspects, it also holds a numerous of demerit. Personally, I completely agree with this idea and my perspective will be clarified in this essay. On the one hand, internet brought heaps of positive effects in human activities. When it comes to searching the information, advanced technology allows us to approach the huge number and diverse knowledge in just a few minutes. For instance, the most ubiquitous searching bar at these times is Google, students in particular and all the users in general are capable to access in individual webs with one click in just 0. 3 seconds. Secondly, this digital also hold a various kind of entertain media which are suitable for all consumers. For example, after a stressful of hours, we can reduce depression by get into movie webs such as Youtube, Netflix as well as some webs just only for online music like Zing. mp3, the popular web in Vietnam. On the other hand, I strongly agree that internet still has negative sides that makes lots of issues in our life. First and foremost, there are many bad effects on health. Internet users can be near-sighted due to they spend too much time on the scree. Furthermore, because of the the dependence on the network, people are no longer energetic. They will not interesting in any outdoor activities or they do not want to broaden their horizon through the real life. As a consequence, they might be led to obesity and addicted to the things that internet has given. For example, Facebook, Instagram, Tiktok and something similar to it. Inconclusion, although internet has a plenty of advantages, I cannot argue that it still includes the bad effects. Therefore, we should consider the way to use it efficiently.
It is an inevitable fact that internet plays vital role in this age of technology. While it contains a great deal of beneficial aspects, it
also
holds
The phrase 'a numerous of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'a' and 'of'.
a numerous of
demerit.
Personally
, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and my perspective will
be clarified
in this essay.

On the one hand, internet brought heaps of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects in human activities. When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to searching the information, advanced technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
us to approach the huge number and diverse knowledge in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a few minutes.
For instance
, the most ubiquitous searching bar at these times is Google, students
in particular
and all the users
in general
are capable to access in individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
webs
with one click in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
0. 3 seconds.
Secondly
, this digital
also
hold a various kind of entertain media which are suitable for all consumers.
For example
, after
The phrase 'a stressful of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'a' and 'of'.
a stressful of
hours, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
depression by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
into movie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
webs
such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
, Netflix
as well
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
webs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for online music like Zing.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
mp3
, the popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
web
in Vietnam.

On the other hand
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that internet
still
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
sides that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
lots of issues in our life.
First
and foremost, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effects on health. Internet users can be near-sighted due to they spend too much time on the scree.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.
the the
dependence on the network,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are no longer energetic. They will not
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "interest"
interesting
in any outdoor
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
activities or
they do not want to broaden their horizon through the real life. As a consequence, they might
be led
to obesity and addicted to the things that internet has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.
For example
, Facebook, Instagram,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tiktok
and something similar to it.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Inconclusion
, although internet has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of advantages, I cannot argue that it
still
includes the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effects.
Therefore
, we should consider the way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it
efficiently
.
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IELTS essay It is an inevitable fact that internet plays vital role in this age of technology. While it contains a great deal of beneficial aspects, it also holds a numerous of demerit.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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